#WednesdaysWithHenry…Day 3

#WednesdaysWithHenry: Day 3

I had decided that 2016 was going to be the year of not really having to “give a damn” about anyone else but me. For the first time in my life I’m single and living alone which means I have no responsibilities to anyone but myself. Wrapping my arms around that little nugget has been a challenge but it’s a new year and I can do it, right?

In Southern California if there is a hint of rain it becomes Storm Watch, fill in the blank for that year, and everyone loses his or her minds. Since I detail cars for a living when it does rain it becomes a God given day off and I have zero cares in the world, other than being able to actually pay my bills.

At the moment I don’t have any Real Estate clients looking to by or sell their home so I do not have to deal with the 100+ car accidents, flooding, traffic jams, getting soaked or even having to find an umbrella that you may or may not own and I’ve never purchased a rain coat.

Upon returning from Texas visiting friends I realized that the beginning of the El Nino storms was due to hit Wednesday, January 6th and it was going to hit hard. All I could think of Tuesday was I need to get a hold of Henry and make sure that he’s out of the rain, I had no idea what that looked like but it had to be done.

At that exact moment I receive a quick and simple email from Henry that just said, “Hi, how was Texas?” There’s been an odd pattern in my life where I can think of someone and then, poof, there they are.

I asked Henry if we could meet the next morning at the Shell Station at 8:00 because I wanted to see about getting him into a shelter so make sure that he stayed warm and dry during the storm that was going to be heading our way.

Henry agreed to meet me but said he didn’t want to go to Father Joe’s and just said, “We can go by and you can see why. I feel safer sleeping outside.” Who am I to argue with a grown man and tell him what he should or shouldn’t do? All I knew at that moment was I needed to do something.

Unfortunately the storm came Tuesday night but it wasn’t the heaviest we were going to be getting. I ended up running around town in the rain trying to find a poncho or rain jacket for Henry…I don’t own either so I just wore a hoodie and looked like a wet rat at the end of the day. I did purchase a two-man tent just in case but he had told me previously that tents are just as good as “sending up a flare for the police to find you”.

I told Henry that we needed some time together to create a plan and to get to know each other a little bit better. We went to McDonald’s and I insisted he order whatever he wanted and by all means to get the large orange juice and the coffee. Again his appreciation for the simple things is worth any gesture that I have done a thousand times over.

The first thing he wanted to talk about was my trip. I let him know that I told my friends Cathey Greenfield and Cheryl McKirnan all about him and his challenges and they decided that one of the first steps to self-confidence is a nice smile or the desire to smile. They asked me to see if it were okay with him would I try to find out what it would cost to have dental work done for Henry to help him get his smile back. That was the first time a tear formed in his eyes and he just said that he needed a minute.

I tend to try my best to keep situations light with humor and sometimes sarcasim. So I just said to him, “I’m not sure the extent of things that can be done or how expensive things will be. Nobody’s going to be calling to put me on the cover of Vogue or you on the cover of GQ but it will be nice to not feel so self conscious about your smile won’t it?” Henry looked me in the eyes and said with a straight face, “I don’t have a phone so we don’t really know if GQ has already tried to call me or not do we?” I realized at that moment that this will be a lifetime friendship and then a tear may have formed in my eyes.

While he was eating his breakfast we had a mini debate about shelters v sleeping on the street. It didn’t last long. He just said that he felt safer on his own and outside but thanked me for trying. He told me that he doesn’t do drugs and there are too many people in the shelters that do and there is violence and he would just rather keep to himself.

So I started looking for inexpensive hotels that may have weekly rates while he told me about himself. I learned that he is 38 years old, probably has a 3rd grade education, started skipping school in the 5th grade and began working as a logger with his older cousin and his uncle at the age of 12. He was making $100 a day and that was much better than working somewhere for $5 an hour and experience wasn’t necessary and there wasn’t any reading or writing required. He casually said, “I may be illiterate.”

Henry is from a small town in Ohio and worked at one of the 3 sawmills in town. When the housing industry fell apart so did the job at the sawmill and the small town that he lived in no longer had jobs. He did his best to get by with framing homes with contractors who were still finishing up houses, cut lawns and did just about anything that anyone would give him a chance at. The fact that Henry is uneducated and chronically poor is probably the reason why Henry is where he is today but he continued trying.

He worked at the Daytona Speedway in June of 2014 and signed up for an adult education class to move towards getting his GED, then things happened and he lost the job, his apartment and ended up “outside”.

Someone in Florida let Henry know that California was a safe and friendly state to be homeless in so he saved bottles and cans for four months and spend $385 on a one-way bus ticket to San Diego and has been here for about 6 weeks. It took 10 days to get here and he told me that he hasn’t seen much of the city but he does feel safer.

I asked Henry if he could gather up all of his things so we could go to a Laundromat and get them washed, he hides things in different areas in case someone does find his stuff it won’t all be stolen at the same time. While he was gone a guy who was sitting near us asked me whom I worked for. When I told him I’m self-employed and detail cars he was shocked because he assumed I worked for an outreach program.

He introduced himself at Kevin and let me know that he had been on and off the streets for 20 years and Henry was right in wanting to be safe. Then he told me about 500 West Hotel, it used to be the YMCA in downtown San Diego. I got on their website and booked a room for Henry at a much better price than what I was going to pay for him to stay in a Howard Johnson’s.

Kevin also let me know that he has a well-known blog and I could find him as thehomelessguy.com. I don’t think it was a coincidence that Kevin was sitting there and I was so humbled when he walked up to Henry and gave him $20 and said he wished him and me luck on our journey.

I received a phone call from my friend Julie Darling just as we were pulling up in front of the hotel and she told me she had food for Henry and she would see us in a second. She wasn’t kidding, all of a sudden she’s behind us at the curb, jumps our of her SUV, hugs Henry, hugs me, then hands Henry a brown shopping bag with two different kinds of soup in pints, tamales and a quiche. Another quick hug and BAM, Henry kisses her on the lips when she’s least expecting it.

We jumped back into my truck because we couldn’t check in yet and needed to go do his laundry. I casually asked, “Did you just kiss Julie on the lips?” He sheepishly replies, “I can’t help myself, you girls are so pretty I just do it”. I just said, “Hey Henry I see pretty girls and want to kiss them too but you don’t see me doing that do you?” Lesson learned.

Everywhere we went that day we ran into kind people. A woman who worked at the Laundromat helped us use the machines that would wash the most clothes for the least amount of money then when we were leaving she gave Henry a pair of jeans that had been there and unclaimed for a while. People are awesome.

During the course of the day I received a text from a very close friend who contacted her dentist, told him the situation and asked if he could possibly see Henry to just exam his teeth, take some x-rays and give me an idea of what can or can’t be done for Henry. Dr. Ramin Ghassemi said to make an appointment for the next day and he would be happy to see him.

I dropped Henry off at 500 West Hotel and reminded him that I would be picking him up the next day at 9:00 am for his dentist appointment. Henry hugged me, gave me a kiss on the cheek and said, “I feel a tear on my face and I can honestly say, I think that it’s a happy tear, I’ve never had one of those before.” I don’t think that that will be the last of Henry’s or my “happy tears”.

#WednesdaysWithHenry keep getting better.