I’m in love with your social media persona

Kate
Kate
Jul 21, 2017 · 3 min read

Buzz there goes your phone.. jump, run, push anyone that stands in your way… you love the way your phone lights up your life in a way no breathing entity can…


What about me, I’m sitting beside you… radiating excitement to be in your ora.. love me! Want me! Be with me in the present.. no technology but real human interaction.


Why is that so hard for people to crave? Let me tell you.. how can I compete with an addiction soo strong.. I must be on the same level.. I grab my phone.. I swipe until something relatable appears.. type in your name then bam! A smile stretches across your face, something I’m craving for.. yet I feel somewhat empty as it wasn’t me that made you smile, it was the euphoria from technology. The buzz, name slides across the screen.

He sees this as more intimate than a kiss..

My excitable nature slowly dulls.. sporadic impulsive remarks and gestures are now only but distant memories.

He becomes secretive, turning his phone over whenever I sit down with him. A transparent interaction of laughing exchanging pass codes and searching for songs through our phones is also a distant memory.

I 'am next to him, he looks at yet another notification from yet another chick. She's next to naked. Sexually gazing up at the phone. Eyes asking for more, craving attention like his acceptance is her drug and her poses are his. Ding, Ding, Ding, like clockwork as the night goes on, he quickly rushes to his phone to see whatever pose she is presenting him with. I see his mind is elsewhere, there is no point talking or engaging in any conversation with him. He’s gone along with my heart, everything in my being screaming at me to smash his phone yet, I sit in silence with my aching bleeding heart, aching until I feel nothing at all.

He eventually opens conversation, he tells me if I change the way I'm emotionally wired he will propose to me one day. I pretend to entertain the thought, that I am the issue. Yet feel next to nothing and internally smile at disbelief of the alternative universe we live in, where this is a social norm.


Addiction to technology and the gratification is only but a warning… How can we ever have a chance at love when we are a slave to the hit of dopamine? No matter how charismatic, confident and interactive you are.. the fight is already lost..

Is there anyone out there that loves human interaction..? Gets more satisfaction from an insightful conversation or a wildly inappropriate conversation being had in the presence of ignorance?

Hiding behind a screen is falsified, sensationalised interaction. Of which anyone can use behind a screen, project confidence and sensationalise their persona. It’s bell shit boring in my mind…


Is there anyone that can see my multiple personas, happy, sad, angry, lustful, wildly inappropriate, driven, thrill seeking and professional sides and is soo fascinated that no technology can compare? Yes I know that sounds narcissistic, however…

Until then.. let’s play the game of a false sense of closeness.. a façade, fuelled only by being soo connected with people you feel disconnected.. 🤦🏼‍♀️

    Kate

    Written by

    Kate

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