1) Swear

It’s a well-known fact* that cursing opens up your chakras and allows you to reduce blood pressure. Directed at the source of your stress it may temporarily at least put an end to your receiving further stress.

2) Throw Tantrums

Who was that one guy who wrote that book about learning everything he needed to know in kindergarten? I rest my case.

3) Drink

Hydration is key to good mind/body balance and martinis make you witty and gay. And sometimes belligerent and arrested, but that’s by the way.

4) Meditation

Every good plan starts with mindful meditation. You cannot maintain world-domination or carry out a perfect crime if you do not meditate carefully on the detail work. Axes don’t bury themselves in skulls, people. It takes thought.

5) Letting Go

Let go of the doubts that hold you back. Let go of your pre-conceived notions of what counts as success. And when the police tell you to drop your weapons, do it.

6) Prioritize

You can’t do everything at once. Divide and conquer should be your motto. That and avoiding land wars in Asia. If you’re making a kill list, some one has to go at the top. Think carefully. Who most deserves to experience the full force of your murderous mood?

7) Know Yourself

Do you know your true self? Are you a pantser or a plotter? Introvert or extrovert? Rage-killer or cold-blooded? Axe or pistol? It will save time if you choose wisely and work to your strengths.

8) Skip anything you don’t want to do

Self-explanatory.

10) Make Lists

And then just throw them away. Or make them into blog posts. And then go have that martini.

[Originally posted at Lady Smut]