Advice from My Therapist on Breaking Down and Staying Balanced During a Pandemic

I had therapy over the phone yesterday, and she shared a few good coping strategies. I hope this can be of use.

The anti-venom: For every bit of bad news that you hear, look up an effort against it. If you tuned in and saw health pros giving terrible stats, go look up a local effort that’s doing things for good. She’s over 65 and has asthma so she’s isolating, but she lives in a big apartment building where they’ve mobilized so if people post a need, others can fill it safely. She’s spending a lot of time looking at her neighborhood’s mutual aid message board and even if she can’t physically act, just knowing it’s out there helps.

The rev-down: If you have someone in your life who is sending around or talking about this scary stat and this scary stat, have something at the ready that is about calm-down. Could be about help, could be about distraction. This probably how they’re coping with their anxiety, but it’s OK to counter it.

The buddy system: If you find yourself freaking out, appoint a partner to tell you everything is going to be OK, even if they have to fib to you a little right now, and have them armed with animal videos, comedies, calm music, etc. They can also set hours for you that you are NOT allowed to look at news or social media. You can do the same for them.

The mourning: If you find yourself breaking down, it’s OK. You are mourning, and that is natural. Some parts of life are going to resolve, and some things are forever changed. We’ll get through them together as a society, but processing this as grief is real and valid and allow yourself to feel it.