Your Child Will Understand One Day
As you watch your child sleep, the guilt creeps up and you whisper ‘I’m sorry’ in the darkness. You’ve told your child to behave for the umpteenth time and you squeeze them tight afterwards, feeling awful for loosing your shit. If you can relate, then this is a message for you:
Stop feeling guilty for being exhausted.
Parenthood is one of the hardest jobs ever, and avid readers will be sick of hearing me say this, but it’s true. And often you need reminding that it’s hard because you need to know how strong you are. It is normal to be angry and frustrated with your child if they’re refusing to eat their food, throwing toys across the room, hitting you whilst having a fit and protesting about bed time. Kids are wonderful, and as parents we love them no matter what and wouldn’t change them for the world — but kids can be hard to deal with and we need to give ourselves a break. It’s OK if you’ve shouted at your child by mistake. It’s OK if you’ve found yourself holding your child and trying to make it up to them for maybe going a little over the top when you told them off.
Because one day, they will understand.
I promise you that the look of contempt and/or confusion on your child’s face when you tell them off won’t last forever. Forgive yourself for being a cranky mom or dad from time to time. Do your kids know they are loved? Are they fed and well looked after? Do they love you like you love them? Do you do your very best for them? Well then, why are you worrying so much?
Because you are a good parent.
Only a good parent would care as much as you do. Only a good parent who cares about their child so much would work themselves to the point of exhaustion and show such passion. Give yourself a break, rest when you can, and remember that you are human and normal and GOOD at what you do. Your child or children love you and remember that one day, when they enter the adult world, have their own place, have their own children, and walk a mile in your shoes — they will understand. They’ll understand why you were sometimes mad, more mad than you perhaps had to be. They’ll gain insight into the sleepless nights, the juggling of big responsibilities, and the overwhelming love and affection you feel for your babies. It’ll all come with time.
So in the meantime, try to remember to be happy, be kinder to yourself, and that you are a good parent.
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