How do they do it?!
Here’s something I’ve noticed lately.
Everyone looks lazy, unproductive, and generally confused on the internet. Everyone’s talking about how they’re netflixing and chilling their life away, being pros at procrastination, vegetating over weekends — basically, reassuring me that I’m normal and that this is okay; that I’m not alone in this (unending) ‘still figuring out adulting’ phase of my life.
But how do these very people who seem to share so much of my insecurity and lack of productivity, still manage to be ‘hustlers’ (God, I hate that word!), growth hackers, internet celebrities, content ‘ninjas’, social media influencers, Ted talk givers?
I’m surprised at how much they manage to accomplish while battling similar challenges, internal and external, going through the ups and downs of life. If everyone’s reading random things on the internet, battling existential crises on most days, figuring things out, why am I here wallowing in mediocrity, laziness, and obscurity?
I spend a lot of my time online - consuming content mindlessly, giggling uncontrollably, scrolling enviously and judging myself endlessly. Everyone seems to be doing so much better, while battling what seem like similar issues. How do they do it? Some days, I’m quick to label it privilege of type X,Y,Z. On others, I attribute it to their exposure, and on some days to part luck — being at the right place at the right time.
But, that’s not being fair to them.I have to admit that there’s a lot of underwater, furious paddling that they do, that I conveniently ignore. Here, I list down my top 5 reasons why I think they’re doing life better (in ways I could too) — and what you (and I) could do to get things going —
1. Getting started
I have figured that the difference between those who do and those who doN’T, is NT. The NT translates to Not Trying.(Genius, right?). You’re never going to know till you start. So, just start already.
2. Doing something small every day
My biggest struggle is with persistence and consistency. As somebody who likes a certain structure and rhythm to my day, I have a hard time actually disciplining myself to stick to doing anything consistently for long enough. That needs to change.
You just have to keep at it. No matter how much you suck, no matter how much people dislike your work, no matter how banal and boring it may seem. You’ve just got to keep at it.
Ritualise the mundane to make way for the amazing, as someone wise once said.
3. Creating
In a generation that’s so used to consumption of all kinds, creating is SO important. It really doesn’t matter what — as long as it is a labour of your work.
4. Putting yourself out there
It’s not enough to just create something, but you’ve got to put yourself out there for scrutiny and criticism — for your own growth. If you’re going to constantly fear ridicule, failure, or apathy (the worst), you’re never really going to grow. Open yourself to every new experience — however intimidating, challenging, unlike-you as it may seem. Haters gonna hate, hell, you’re going to hate too. But, it doesn’t matter. Just be open — to everything the experience has to offer. I’m sure you’ll be richer for it — sooner or later.
5. Being kind to yourself
This for me, is the most important. I’m an extremely self-critical person, going through long phases of self-doubt, loathing, and imposter syndrome between some short-lived self-assured phases. A lot of this comes with having high expectations of myself, and also, letting what others think affect me.
If I learn to be kind to myself, the rest will take care of itself — criticism won’t hit so hard, plenty of second chances will follow, comparisons will start appearing to be what they are — futile.
These, I believe, are things one can do to actually be better versions of themselves. But, I have to say that there are a lot of things that do come from a place of privilege and good fortune. The most important, in my opinion, being the constants in a very variable life
As someone who craves stability, these support anchors are so critical to me and people in general. Whether it’s a cosy home to come home to, a partner to hug after a hard day, family that has your back. — these constants I believe help you manage the variables that life throws at you. So, if you have these, thank your stars, and hold on tight! In a world that’s constantly changing, I think it helps to have something of your own — to have, hold, and hug