The Most Common Limiting Beliefs and How You Can Overcome Them
“Limiting beliefs.” We often hear this phrase spoken by self-help gurus, life coaches, motivational speakers, and more. But what are they, really?
A limiting belief is anything you believe about yourself, about other people, or about the world which limits you in some way. It could be a belief that you’re not good enough to be loved by others, that you have little control over your life, that you’re destined to be unhappy, or that only really special people are capable of achieving their dreams (and you’re just not one of them!).
When we hold limiting beliefs, we often are unwilling to take chances, we miss opportunities due to fear or our own inflexibility, and we condemn ourselves to be victims of our current circumstances.
Here’s the difficulty: most of the time, our limiting beliefs are subconscious, which means we aren’t even aware that our opinion on a particular concept is actually holding us back. Even people with high levels of self-confidence experience subconscious biases which affect the way they view the world or their capabilities.
The good news? Once we identify the limiting beliefs that we hold, we can counteract them with alternatives. In reality, our choices and potential are actually limitless!
Common Examples of Limiting Beliefs and their Limitless Alternatives
About Money
Limiting Belief: It’s impossible to become rich unless you came from money.
Limitless Alternative: Anyone can become rich if they have an idea, a plan, determination, and are providing value to others.
Limiting Belief: I’ll never have enough money to live the life I want to live.
Limitless Alternative: There is endless abundance and prosperity out there for those who work hard and seize it.
About Self-Worth
Limiting Belief: I’ll never be good enough.
Limitless Alternative: I can become my most desired version of myself.
Limiting Belief: I just wasn’t born beautiful, smart, talented, funny, etc.
Limitless Alternative: Labels don’t define me. I know my worth and what qualities are most important to me, regardless of what society thinks is necessary to feel worthy.
About Our Careers
Limiting Belief: Everyone hates their job, so why should I expect anything different for myself?
Limitless Alternative: Plenty of people have jobs that they love because they take time to get to know themselves and make the effort to pursue what makes them happy.
Limiting Belief: Only really qualified people can start their own business, and I’m not one of them.
Limitless Alternative: Anyone can start a business. You don’t need a degree or any certifications to come up with a solution that provides value to others.
About Relationships
Limiting Belief: I always put more effort into my friendships than what I receive. Either my friends are inconsiderate or I’m just not good enough.
Limitless Alternative: I don’t see friendships as a game of quid-pro-quo. It’s my choice to put in effort into those I care about, and I do so cheerfully regardless of how it’s reciprocated.
Limiting Belief: My childhood was painful and difficult. I experience struggles today because of past trauma with my family.
Limitless Alternative: While I recognize the importance of the events of my past, I don’t let them or my relationships define me. I’m not a victim, I’m a victor.
About Happiness
Limiting Belief: Most people aren’t happy so why should I expect to be?
Limitless Alternative: Other people’s inability to be happy has nothing to do with my ability to create happiness for myself.
Limiting Belief: I’m unhappy because of all of the pain I’ve experienced throughout my life.
Limitless Alternative: I have the ability to transform any adversity into seeds of positive change. I recognize my happiness doesn’t depend on the things I experience, but my attitude toward them.
About Change
Limiting Belief: This is just who I am, and I can’t change.
Limitless Alternative: I evolve to be better each and every day. If I don’t like the current version of myself, I can always become who I want to be.
Limiting Belief: I’m overwhelmed. I’ve always felt this way, and I’m going to feel like this forever.
Limitless Alternative: How I feel today is not how I’ve always felt or how I’m always going to feel. This too shall pass.
About Success and Failure
Limiting Belief: If I fail at one thing, then I’m a failure at everything.
Limitless Alternative: I don’t let one mistake or failure define me. I see myself as a winner even though I experience setbacks.
Limiting Belief: I’d rather not try at all than risk failure.
Limitless Alternative: I’d rather risk failure than never try at all!
Did any of the limiting beliefs from the list strike a chord within you? Or maybe they led you to think of other areas of life where you might be holding yourself back?
The first step toward replacing our limiting beliefs with limitless alternatives is recognizing them. Are there particular opinions you hold on subjects that tend to be negative or pessimistic? Do you ever feel an internal struggle wanting to pursue something, then talking yourself out of it? If so, then limiting beliefs are likely at work.
Exercise: Identify and Overcome Your Limiting Beliefs Using Limitless Alternatives
Make Your List: Review the list of limiting beliefs above once more and make note of any that you currently hold. Add to your list 5–10 additional limiting beliefs of your own and their limitless alternatives in the form of a positive, present-tense affirmation.
Note How the Limitless Alternatives Make You Feel: Once you have your list ready, read through the positive affirmations a few times. Notice how they make you feel. Do you feel resistant to them? Do they make you feel excited?
Access a Resource Mindset: What type of mindset would be a resource for you as you attempt to make these new alternatives your reality? Would feeling confident, grateful, or excited help you be in a better state of mind to accept and believe the alternatives?
Access a Past Memory of that Resource Mindset: Once you’ve identified a resource mindset, think back to a situation when you experienced it in the past. Relive the experience and allow yourself to be filled with positive feelings.
Read Your Limitless Alternatives While Accessing the Resource Mindset: As you read through the list of alternatives again, allow yourself to be filled up with the positive feelings of your resource mindset. How do you feel about them now?
Repeat Daily: Continue to add to your list and practice this exercise daily until the limitless alternatives become true beliefs!
