So I wanted to start a blog…

There are so many options when it comes to blogging. So many that I even decided to sit down and google “best websites to start a blog”. I ironically read a blog post on just that. So here I am, watching my thoughts turn into words on my fading computer screen at eleven o clock at night, my room is much too hot and my brain is much to full. I do enough analyzing to keep it quite busy. My mom even shared with me the term “analysis paralysis”. She explained that when we sit around and analyze our circumstances and the people around us and what they mean instead of actually living life, we become paralyzed. Figuratively of course, but paralyzed all the same. It’s ironic to me that this fight for control results in much less control than we strive for.

Could it be true that letting go actually allows us to gain a better grip on life?

But do we even have a grip at all? Is there anyone in this world that actually has a grip?

Doubt it.

Humans are far from perfect, I learn that lesson more and more each and every day. Sometimes I feel as if the mistakes, regret, and hurt that I live with today will only go on to be replaced with a different breed of mistakes, regret, and hurt tomorrow. I am constantly failing, but I am also constantly getting back up and trying again. The cycle is endless, and nearly exhausting, but I tell myself that it somehow has to be worth it. At this moment though, I don’t know how. All I know is that I have a strong hope in something greater, and it is that hope that keeps me going. It is that hope that keeps me alive.