Moving from NYC to SFO
8/14 The drag of emotions
One more day and then ciao NYC. At this point I am more than ready. The question of the place came up again. We need to make choices, quality, price, convenience etc. It’s complicated but doable.
Today. Execute a few trades. We decided to exit TRW. Business meeting over lunch. Afternoon 12mi run, then core workout. Then buy travel bag. Soccer in park with Kye, Packing. Dinner.
It’s funny how my mind has checked out of New York. It is as if I am not here anymore. Everything just flashes by like a movie. I guess that is the only way a human brain can deal with big changes — get used to it and flash out memories. I am ok with that.
Memories are a funny thing. They are attached to emotions. We see that everyday in the hedge fund business. It is much harder to sell a stock than to buy it. Why? Because of memories. When buying a stock a fund manager puts a lot of mental energy into analyzing the situation. When the decision is made to buy there is a feeling of accomplishment. Like, I actually do something. I add value.
If the situation works out and the stock appreciates you have to be disciplined and sell. But the real problem comes up when you decide to sell even though your thesis has not worked out. How do you acknowledge when you’re wrong?
That’s the hard part. It means giving up the feeling of accomplishment you had when you bought the stock. it means accepting intellectual defeat.
The funny thing is, though. Once you pull the trigger, it’s like the memory is wiped out. With me it takes minutes and I don’t feel any attachment anymore.
Why is memory so central? It’s because of emotions. That’s why it is so hard for us to change. We attach stuff to emotions and those emotions become a huge drag on our decisions.
I strongly believe that humans need to renew themselves every now and then. Renew your thinking, your body and occasionally your place of stay.
Don’t get me wrong. I am not advocating a nomad lifestyle. I don’t mind staying in one place for 10 years or more. But when the feeling creeps in that you are done with the place, you need to act. It’s hard to put it in words why that happens. But the feeling does’t cheat. It is clear and crisp. You need to move.
I don’t have a recipe for how to deal with memory and emotions. A few rules work for me.
- Never accept the status quo. Question it every day.
- If your feeling tells you something, then listen. Don’t rationalize it, just listen.
- Always do the right thing, don’t put your own feeling above other peoples’ emotions.
- Act quick and crisp. Don’t let your mind confuse you.
Good luck with changing.