A Mother’s Advice to Her Daughter, One Technical Woman to Another

When you’re the minority, intimidation is bound to happen.

Dear Emma,

Surprise! I have only one piece of advice as you head off to college. Really. Just one thing to share as you enroll in the most challenging classes you’ve ever taken. As you embark on your journey to become a software engineer. As you join the ranks of a minority group—a woman in the male-dominated world of tech. And when you’re the minority, intimidation is bound to happen.

My one piece of advice? Don’t let anyone make you feel like you don’t belong.

Intimidation can take many forms. Here are just a few:

Perhaps there’s someone in your first CS class who already has an app for sale in an app store. It may make you feel that you don’t have the experience you need to be successful in the class. Just because this kid probably had a teacher who laid out the steps to building a mobile app, he or she doesn’t have any more of a right to be in that class than you. You deserve to be there as well.

Or you meet someone who’s already won awards at hackathons. And you’re going to feel intimidated. Congratulate them, but remember that you belong in your computer science program just as much as the next kid.

Or you show up to an event about summer internships, and at the front of the line is that kid who always raises their hand to answer every question in your CS class. And the recruiter is clearly enamored. Don’t let it get to you. You’re qualified for a shot at that internship, too.

When you find yourself feeling intimidated (and it’s going to happen, trust me), please remember my advice. You have every right to become a computer scientist and enjoy a career in tech. Don’t let anyone take that away from you.

Oh, and one last thing: Your dad and I will be rooting for you every step of the way.

Love,
Mom

© 2014 by Karen Catlin. All rights reserved.