First Touch
Darren Coxon

Nice!! I love first touch from the first girl’s hair. It’s a great entry point for the poem. One word that struck me was copse. It stuck out for whatever reason (maybe visually close to corpse?). You might play with something that has stronger positive connotations. Grove or thicket maybe.

I wanted to know more about the ‘four of us discovering how it felt to grow.’ Who is us? I was also intrigued/surprised by the juxtaposition of “straw-scratched and happy” with “choking air.”

I think my favorite stanza is the first! I would love a whole poem about the cherry lipgloss girl.

Thanks for sharing this piece with us! Glad you’re here :)