My Struggle with Depression
About three years ago I finally quit lying to myself and the rest of the world and acknowledged a huge problem. I knew that suicide was not the answer but I felt so uncomfortable living. I spent 3 years prior living that way. Stuck in a miserable rut of depression. I spoke up and got the help of anti anxiety and anti depressants. Which only made me feel hungover, inattentive, and made me no longer interested in things I was passionate about. I gained about 20 lbs during this time, making me feel more miserable. Then I realized these stupid chemicals I was putting in my bod weren’t really helping. So I got rid of them and started getting real help. My counselor was awesome. ( not a therapist who will just sit and diagnose) she helped me through the main causes of my depression and helped me come up with new ways of dealing and helped me set goals for myself and get my life back to how it was prior to all of this.
Following up with finally feeling sane again, I felt the urge to move, begin again and get away from the memories that haunt me. I came to Asheville, North Carolina. I can’t say that I don’t get those heighten feelings but I know how to deal and what to do to avoid them and ultimately conquer them. I now know that no one can really hurt me now, they just can’t. I’ve been broken down for such a long time that nothing can really do it again. I’m not going to say that I haven’t been hurt but instead if wallowing in it, I rise from it. The more I am let down by others the stronger I mentally feel. It took me a little while to finally admit to others I had a problem but I just want to help those who have the same feelings. Depression is not who you are.