As a lifelong Patriots fan, I’ve had a cascading roller coaster of emotions. First, I ditched that fukwagon after they became full time Trump cheerleaders. I smiled a little when I remembered Putin once confiscated Kraft’s super bowl ring when he went over to show it off. He even mused about killing people with it as he left the room with some KGB secret service guys.
In essence, I became a temporary Falcons fan during the super bowl. I jumped around and texted a lot in the first half. This greatly confused my friends that aren’t into politics.
I was very sad in the second half. I turned my phone off
I cried and wished death upon everyone who went to the celebratory parade
I grinned happily when it rained and got really cold and gloomy in Boston that day
I wished torn ACL’s for all players that pledged to visit the White House
I made mean Brady memes and posted them on Reddit
I considered burning my vintage edition Brady jersey
Found out Brady was in fact not going to D.C.
Ordered a new Brady jersey on Amazon