I salute you on making a stand based on your research and understanding. It is this same rational thinking that they groom us to use when they paint there picture that they are “the truth.” I too studied with them, but I was a constant failure when it came to the festive holiday eating on Thanksgiving and Christmas, the boiled egg eating on Easter, the Halloween candy eating on Halloween, and giving of gifts on Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, and Valentine’s Day….all of which are supposed to be pagan holidays according to the Witnesses. I grew tired of wrestling with my desire to follow them and their teachings and coming home to my parents who would ridicule the religion and make me out of a fool to be following them. One Sunday I ended up in our family Baptist Church and got moved to get baptized along with my mom and dad who were trying to make things right in THEIR lives by doing so. My dad was glad to be the one to tell my JW studying friend the news about my baptism, and he consequently broke off all of our studies after that like the chain had been broken once and for all. Needless to say, I am not a current associate of JW’s after twenty-eight years or so, but strangely a brother of mine who used to watch me go to studies week after week and used to talk against it with my parents and poke fun at it is now studying with them and going to conventions. I like that you still have an open mind about it all and about where your thoughts my take you in the future. I’m sorry about how you got separated from your sister and estranged from your brother because of the disfellowshipment of them. Good luck with your new life!