I help everyone except for myself. I focus on others more than I focus on myself.
I suffer, so other don’t have to. I’ve always had the Answers. I’ve always been the one people Needed to talk to. Ive always Been There to give affection.
The worst suffering however is feeling you can’t. Wanting. Longing. Needing. To help. Trying to reach but not being able to.
When you don’t have the Answers they need. When instead you Need help but are too ashamed to ask. When you’re too afraid to Show affection.
I want to just pull them in and hold them without letting go but I can’t. I want to give a real hug, but I can’t. I want to be there but I can’t. I want to fix everything but I can’t. I don’t have the answers. This is over my head and I want to climb higher but I feel incapable. I want to see the light over the wall of oppression, depression; but I can’t.
One day I will. Maybe I’ll decide not to care-In multiple, different ways.