Why there is no such thing as a “League” in Dating or Romantic Relationships

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I’m sure you’ve heard of these phrases: “She’s out of my league, she’ll never date me.” or “He’s out my league, he’ll never ask me out.” What is this “league” that people are talking about when it comes to dating?

From my experience, this “league” that people are talking about is nothing more than a superficial concept that people a long time ago made up. Most of it has to do with a physical attractiveness of a person and his/her partner.

When the guy is ugly and the girl he’s dating is pretty, people will say “oh he’s rich” or “oh that girl must have low standards.” When the girl is ugly and the guy is good-looking, people will say “that guy must have an exotic taste.”

It’s a toxic and shallow concept that people unconsciously use. If a “league” was true, then there would be no ugly guys with attractive girlfriends, there would be no ugly girls with attractive husbands. It has to stop.

What people don’t realize is another age old concept that “beauty is in the eye of the beholder.” There are other things that make people attractive other than their looks or how pretty of a face they have.

  • Physical Fitness/Aesthetics/Athleticism

People can’t change their face, but they can change their body. Studies show that an attractive body makes up for an unattractive face. This goes for both men and women.

People are attracted to fit people because they have a high amount of sex appeal. I know guys and girls who don’t have a really attractive face, but they regularly workout and maintain their body, and a lot of people are still attracted to them.

  • Personality

What’s the use of being attractive if you have a personality of a rock? Yes you might be hot, but you’re not fun to be around or talk to. People still won’t be attracted to you.

I know a girl in college, she’s below average in looks, some might even call her ugly, but she has the funnest personality in the class. She can make anyone laugh and have a good time. Needless to say that there are guys who ask her out on a regular basis because of that.

  • Confidence

You might be the most attractive person in the room, but you don’t even believe it. You believe that you’re ugly, even though the people around you take a second look at you when they notice you.

Sometimes being attractive is a mindset. If you believe that you’re handsome/beautiful, other people are going to start believing you too.

I know one girl who looks like a model, but she believes she’s ugly because her older brothers kept teasing her when she was younger. It’s a waste because she’s repelling guys just because of her low self-confidence.

  • Interest/Hobbies

Cool hobbies makes you attractive. Guys who play guitar, no matter how good looking they are, will get girls attracted to them. Girls who play sports, especially the sports dominated by men, will get guys attracted to them because they stand out(and they’re also physically fit).

Hobbies and interests make a person’s life interesting, and who wouldn’t be attracted to an interesting person?

  • Career/Money

Last but not the least, your career or financial status. For the career, as long as you have a decent job that pays the bills, you will be an attractive potential partner for stability reasons. It’s only a bonus if your job or business pays high.

As for the money, there’s an old saying “No money, no honey.” Let’s face it, money is important in life. You can’t do most things without money. Yes money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy things or experiences that will make you happy. It can also buy things you actually need like food, water, a house, medicine etc. This is the main reason why most attractive women are somewhat attracted to guys who are rich or well off.

These are the main things that makes a person attractive, other than their looks. If you have even just one or two of these, you will be an attractive person, no matter how good looking you are.

A “league” won’t even be a problem for you. You will be on a league of your own.

Written by

Personal Development/Self-Improvement Writer

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