I’ve been working on myself and that is the most important work even if you don’t get paid for it” -@BigSean
Negative Emotions Invading Personal Peace
As an empath anyone that I become close to, anything in their energy field can become a part of my energy field. Simply put sometimes it’s like contagious emotions. Me being an empath or highly sensitive person means I can pick up or sense emotions that are not easily perceived with the five senses. Some people recognize this gift as being clairsentient which is exactly what I described previously. Taking it a step further I can sense whether people are in a good space or have emotional blockages within. My other gift is intuition (better described as a psychic) so if there are any blockages I can easily explain to someone how to even work through these burdens and where in their life they got stuck. I personally plan on getting certified and working in this field pretty soon. Can you imagine how I don’t keep many friends with these gifts though. (Bad joke)
So background information out the way I’m currently dealing with someone very close to me that has some energetic blockages and issues with communicating emotions in a raw way. They know how to talk to people in a factual way which is good for others that don’t understand how to utilize logic, but that isn’t me. The conversations aren’t connective and I can leave wondering where my advice went. So I am expressing issues that internally are eating me up inside and their usual response is something factual like “you should pay more attention to the now” which can sometimes be perceived as dismissive. You made a valid point but that doesn’t really address the issue in a clearly defined manner. When I attempt to make them aware of how these generalized responses make me feel, I feel a huge divide between us, and I’ve been here so many times before with people where I just shut down.
As an empath (as most empaths know) the way we process things such as people and situations involving people is totally different from most. We sense everything down to the core of the emotion, we take it all personally. I’ve always been a fairly logical individual even for a woman, more than most and I learned to ignore my emotions when I was younger but as I came more into my spirituality I learned to treasure my emotions and use them as keys to finding the answers I need. Since then this strategy of combining logic and emotion has propelled me to tremendous internal growth. One day I would love to teach people how easy this is, introspective ground work is hard but is SO rewarding because it becomes easier to assess along the way unlocking valuable information.
Bottom line is I feel stuck, because that is a part of their development that they refuse to recognize and I can feel it. So on the flip side I leave from conversations feeling unfulfilled and even more misunderstood than before. This brings up triggers for me that in the past would force me to shut down. Deep down I don’t want to, because I am trying to grow past my old programming. Feeling like a child being only told what to do, but not recognizing how I feel or making me feel small about my feelings.
I’ve been meditating more to gain clarity and to check myself. I have a simple internal check system that guides me on how to accurately assess whether it’s me or someone else. This, one day I will also share…sometimes the process can be different for others. As a highly sensitive you have to truly be aware and honest with yourself as to whether someone is contributing to your growth or harming it. This principle can be applied to anyone though. Even if they know it or not, I’ve been here many times where I’ve gotten close to people who are uncomfortable with the way I choose to address my issues and emotions in a transparent way. That type of work requires people to be accountable and aware which not everyone likes. Some people also love the honesty until it requires honesty from themselves, at that point you have to make a decision.
Anyone you deal with should not leave you in a stagnant state of living, internally and externally. The internal always comes first because it can dictate the external, your thoughts and feelings design your reality.
I am hoping for a solution because it’s someone I really care about. I’m feeling held back because if my own emotions cause them to respond that way how can I ever manage to get them to even recognize and be open with their own? I always feel the need to connect deeply with anyone I make an effort to build a relationship with.