Andy Burnham
Jul 21, 2017 · 2 min read

As a dude, I think I might have a bit of an insight into this phenomenon. While I don’t think I’ve ever actually used the dreaded “HaHa” in text myself, I can see its appeal and can totally understand why guys use it, especially when texting women.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a given man’s ability to communicate is invariably lesser or inferior compared to that of a given woman. To what degree this statement is factually accurate is a subject for another time, but generally speaking, folks do seem to operate on this assumption most of the time. Most men know this, having had plenty of experience with awkward conversations with women to reflect on.

“How do I let them know I’m not, like, upset, or disinterested, or peeved, or over-interested, or pissed off, or just plain creepy? If this was in-person, I’d punctuate my statement with a sheepish smile, or maybe shrug my shoulders non-committally. I’ve seen women use emoji for this kind of thing, but that just seems too childish or girly for me.”

The truth is, a lot of us men-folk are pretty self-conscious about how we’re perceived, and the best response we’ve got for this kind of thing is the textual (and somewhat more masculine) version of little girls decorating their notes with little hearts, flowers, and smileys.

My daughter did the same thing, but verbally; she knew that when somebody’s laughing, everybody is supposed to be happy. “It’ll make people like me!” she thinks.

So that’s what I think: a bunch of insecure dudes just trying to appear non-threatening and/or friendly, at the expense of some elegance.

Haha.

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Andy Burnham

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