In Defense of the Sociopath

There’s a stigma in American society where people can flippantly point at others and “accuse” them of having serious mental disorders like psycho- and sociopathy, while we make tasteless jokes about mental health targeting folks who may or may not have them. In this way, people seem to give up on neurodivergent (ND) folk they knowingly encounter because they don’t feel like actually learning more about the individual, or they fear that ND folk might be too difficult to deal with based on assumptions and untrue stereotypes perpetuated by folks who are otherwise clueless as to the scientific and societal roots of neurodivergence.

So, here is a short run-down of the main differences between psychopathy and sociopathy, along with a little taste of the psychological development of a sociopathic brain, and a note of admonishment to think of other human beings as individual people, and not through the foggy lens of the construct of stereotypes.

1. Sociopathy, like psychopathy, is an antisocial personality disorder, but unlike psychopathy, it is more a result of nurture than nature. The symptoms manifest themselves in personal relationships, because many sociopaths grew up experiencing substandard family and social relationships for whatever reasons. Not only have they not experienced functional relationships, but they have been scarred in such a way that they find it incredibly difficult to create it — they’ve had 0 practice (and because of stigma around developmental behavior, often feel like they’re better off keeping to and looking out for only themselves).
2. Sociopaths can and often do have consciences and feelings, they’re just not directed the same way society expects from the average human. I bring up societal standards because lack of conscience in groups (the mob mentality) is accepted as normal, and is even to be expected. Do we genuinely believe that most humans have powerful upstanding consciences that somehow dissolve into blind, irrational hatred when placed in a bigger group of similarly inherently good people? Because aiming to single out someone who seemingly has little regard for others as a means to make oneself feel better about their own well-formed conscience while defending and partaking in global systems that have little regard for millions/billions of other people is extremely hypocritical. Most people assume that if someone doesn’t care for the individual, they cannot care for the group. Yet in most privileged societies, everyone (yes, even you) can care for the individual, but do not care for larger groups, especially if members of those groups are geographically more removed from the subject. Why, then, is it so hard to imagine that there are people who can feel for entire groups but have a hard time doing so for specific individuals? All of us are dissatisfied with how our societies operate; most of us have been conditioned by a standard society to know what to say and how to behave and what to think and how to feel; some of us are less able and/or less dedicated to maintaining such a facade.
3. If one speaks to a diagnosed sociopath about their upbringing, they might get a chilling and uncomfortable story. As a society, we routinely praise folks who pulled themselves up by the bootstraps from socioeconomic and emotional squalor to become noted figures in the public and private sectors, working to help society in some way because they really care about others. We don’t really acknowledge the support systems people have in certain situations (a kid with depression in a middle class family can seek treatment; one living below the poverty line cannot), and if you were literally alone and managed to create a decent, normal enough life for yourself, your entire rearing was about self-preservation and protection. That is how you grew up. Your brain doesn’t suddenly change that objective because you’re finally 25 and have nice coworkers.

Because most of the symptoms of various mental disturbances manifest in adolescence/early adulthood, identity becomes a huge part of mental illness. You cannot assume that those living with these obstacles do not know or sense that there is something different about them, or that they haven’t dealt with family and friends who have rejected them or folks who have destroyed their limited attempts at forming social networks behind their backs for something they cannot control. You cannot assume socio/psychopaths are inherently bad, that their neurodivergence and the issues they are going through are somehow more of an issue for you than it is for them, or that you’re in immediate risk of murder by chainsaw. If anyone is taking a serious toll on your personal mental health, do what you need to do as safely as you can, but we can’t run around demonizing folks who, most of the time, haven’t even DONE anything wrong without thinking of a way to provide some sort of support system for them. Those living with mental illness weren’t put on this Earth so other people can feel a sense of superiority for finding it easier to fit into society.