“I want to quit because making it seems harder than just settling into being average and not trying. If I didn’t try, I could switch off that part of my brain that wants to, and find a comfortable job and get tired and get done.”

I’ve been thinking that a lot lately, when $$ isn’t rolling in and I have no idea what my next steps should be. How much easier it would be to just go get a normal job. And then I start thinking, like you also mentioned, how maybe I’m not cut out for this. Maybe I was always meant to have a regular job and I’m just fooling myself.

I have that little pity party for a bit and then I remember how awful I felt in corporate America and how I felt trapped and lost every single day. And then I realize this worry about money and making it big is the trade-off for freedom and creativity. It’s all about which worry you’d rather have? Stable income but a ho-hum job, or ebbs and flows (sometimes very ebby) in fulfilling work? What can you live with more? I’m with you — I’m going to keep showing up to the game and see what happens.