Recently I’ve taken on more mentoring responsibilities within our UX Research Team. Up to this point, I’ve been an independent contributor, and that’s always suited me just fine. I’m an introvert who likes working quietly and dedicatedly on a project, then producing the results, getting appreciated, and doing it all over again.
But as a Lead, and as part of a light re-structuring of how we support our stakeholders, I’ve got two newer researchers to turn into rock stars.
This is a new dynamic to me, and it’s important to me that we start off strong. I’ve done my best to be open about my shortcomings and my strengths, how to work harmoniously with me, what to do if they’re feeling ignored. In turn, they shared their own working styles and preferences. It’s gonna take time, but I think the three of us are really starting to get comfortable with each other.
We sync up at the beginning of every week, and we always spend the first 5 minutes or so doing the same thing: we look at a big wheel of human emotions (pictured above) and talk about our feelings.
It’s cheesy, I know. The first couple weeks were a little stiff. I usually go first, and sometimes it’s related to events in my personal life, other times it’s about work. Sometimes I’ve asked them how they felt over the weekend or how they felt after looking at their calendar for the week.
But inside of a month, it’s already feeling more natural. It’s just what we do. And I’m learning things about my team members that wouldn’t come up if we focused only on project updates, team processes, or best practices.
It’s not just about fostering connections, though. This intentional discussion of our emotions is my sneaky (maybe not so sneaky) way of encouraging ‘labeling.’ Researchers have discovered that people who are able to define their emotions (label them) are able to process them more effectively — relish in the good, cope with the bad.
Finally, the exercise flexes a few muscles that the workplace doesn’t always — but definitely should — encourage:
- One is self reflection. When you’re attuned to how you feel, you’re quicker to recognize stress and alleviate it. You’re less likely to speak rashly and damage your workplace relationships. You’re more likely to identify when something is bothering you and take the right steps to remedy the issue, instead of letting things build up until you explode.
- Another is being open. While you probably shouldn’t bring all your emotional baggage to work, I believe the best workplaces do give you space to express how you feel, without chastising you for feeling that way. No one wants to be an open book 100% of the time, but I think this exercise is a weekly reminder that hey, just because you’re at work doesn’t mean you have to hide how you feel.
If a feelings wheel doesn’t feel right, there are other ways to get a pulse on how your team is feeling. Our Director’s monthly Alignment calls have kicked off with a poll using a silly internet meme:
It’s interesting to see how many teammates are feeling mostly upbeat (1 or 2) and how many are…a bit deflated. And whatever your number is, you’re probably not alone in feeling that way.
No matter how you implement it, a feelings check is a subtle way to introduce emotional intelligence in the workplace. It encourages self-reflection, openness, and acceptance. Team members who are self-aware and able to process emotions have an easier time resolving conflict, empathize more easily with colleagues, and are generally more satisfied at work.
Do your leaders do something similar? I’d love to hear about it!
