A Kiasu Letter to the Singapore Editor: Leave Pokemon Go people alone

A Kiasu Letter to the Singapore Editor,

As a fellow Singaporean, I must express my disappointment at the online cynicism towards the Pokemon Go craze. It has changed my life.

Before Pokemon Go, I hadn’t left the house for one year plus. And that was when I went to McDonalds for the Hello Kitty SG 50 special.

Pokemon Go is making me exercise like crazy now. At the weekend, I walked 3km with my “trainers” (that’s what we call Pokemon players, for those of you that have a real life.) And then we ran 2km some more when we trespassed into a private property in Bukit Timah. I must say also, the police did not show much community spirit. We didn’t mean to knock over the homeowner’s fence. And we had no idea that he kept chickens.

Pokemon Go is also bringing back the community spirit, the kampong spirit. In Hougang, I spoke to more people in one night than I’ve spoken to in the last year. We said loads of stuff like, “sorry” … “sorry, I never see you” … “sorry, again” … “eh, sorry, ah” … “sorry, I whack your kid with my phone” … “just put his head back, ah, to stop the bleeding.”

Most of all, I reject the accusation that we are sad, lonely, myopic geeks living in a virtual reality with no chance of finding a real friend or a partner and even less chance of getting laid. For your information, I have spoken to more girls since the Pokemon Go launch (seven) than I have in my entire secondary and tertiary academic career (five … and most of them were involved in a university initiation ritual that I’d rather not talk about.)

The Singapore Government needs to consider the positive benefits of Pokemon Go on our declining population. At many busy areas, I’ve seen Pokemon catchers (that’s what we call people who catch Pokemon, the jargon is a little technical) mingle together. My fellow Singaporean Pokemon catchers and I sit there for many hours together. On one or two occasions, we even talk. I’ve had long, enjoyable conversations with several girls now, saying deep and meaningful things like … “there got Pokemon”.

One girl even asked to borrow my portable phone charger so she could find more Pokemon. I might ask to marry her.

So I do not appreciate the negative publicity surrounding the Pokemon Go craze in Singapore. It is making us more outdoorsy, more active and more communicative. We go where we are told. We do as we are told. We never question. We just go. Surely, this is the kind of valuable training we need to work for the Civil Service?

All the best,

Mr Poh Kee Mon