A male friend is in a toxic workplace where an employee he’s managing doesn’t respect him.
Without thinking, I blurted out, “do you have any women on your (hardware) team?” He was a bit defensive, because he works hard to hire women. “Well, is your PM (product manager) a woman?” No. “How about the software team? Is there anyone involved in the tech side at your company to do some of the Emotional Labor to help make your work environment more healthy?” No, no one.
I said women do this work whether we want to or not, and it takes time away from our real work, and that has to be considered for promotions and raises and even work timeline. “You may have to hire a woman who’s not as good.”
This gave us both a lot to think about.