SCARED TODAY.

That this is all there is.

That I may not make it till tomorrow

That I will have many more empty tomorrows.

That I’ll never be.

That I will always be.

Scared of what follows expectations, and the emptiness that comes with expecting nothing.

Scared of who I was.

Scared I will never become who I am trying to be.

Scared of the shame, will it outlive me?

Scared of the pain, petrified of the joy.

Scared that you will leave.

Scared that I will always be lonely.

Scared of company, of open doors/hearts, what are you trying to see?

Scared of my laughter, scared of how much comfort the tears bring.

Scared of all this wanting, of never having.

Scared of having, but never being content.

Scared of settling.

Scared I will be forgotten.

Scared I will be remembered.

Scared today.

And yesterday.

Scared everyday.

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