Rape is not always in a dark alley

Urvashi Goverdhan
Sep 2, 2018 · 2 min read

The first time I was molested, I was 14. I was raped at 19. I know TOO MANY WOMEN who have been raped, molested, or more. I understand that boys and men can also be victims. I understand that women can also be perpetrators. I am not discounting those experiences when I talk about these. We have to expand our definition of rape to include more than assault and violence. Rape is not always in a dark alley on a late night.

  • Rape is your boyfriend making you feel like you’re showing your love.
  • Rape is a husband who only wants you for you body.
  • Rape is your friend saying you can stay over and waking you up in the middle of the night with his body between your legs.
  • Rape is your Tinder date insisting you go over to his place.
  • Rape is your boyfriend getting angry when you say no because you’re tired.
  • Rape is your uncle teaching you things you’re not ready to know.
  • Rape is your cousin saying you’re just playing house and that you’re the wife.
  • Rape is wanting to peel the skin off your body the next day.
  • Rape is realizing what actually happened only years later.
  • Rape is you telling yourself it’s okay because technically you were in his bed.
  • Rape is suffering in silence because after all, he’s your husband.
  • Rape is a game you’re too young to understand but old enough to know you don’t enjoy.
  • Rape is men being told to try harder and women being told to be quiet.
  • Rape is calling a woman a piece of meat and a man a lion.
  • Rape is telling the victim she deserved it.
  • Rape is entitlement.
  • Rape is powerplay.
  • Rape is more than “a bad experience”.
  • Rape is more than “non consensual sex”.
  • Rape is not always in a dark alley on a late night.

Call it what it is. Say the word. It’s scary at first but the shame will turn to anger and hopefully, eventually the wounds will heal.

Urvashi Goverdhan

Written by

Actor, Vlogger, Wannabe

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