I so hear all of this. Also; hysterical. Damn.
As a side note: I’ve 100% given up on maturity. I tried it in a couple of different sizes and even had one version altered slightly to suit me, and they all disintegrated upon contact with my daily life. My life is the hostile uterus equivalent to maturity’s environment. Plus, I’m forever confused by standards that are based on money; I’ve never had a lot of it and I think imagining how I would behave with it is just beyond me. ???? #derp I’m certain I wouldn’t do mature things with it. *I purchased a lipstick shaped like a penis because it made me laugh. I’ll see myself out.