4/10/19 You can’t help but feel dragged in by the gravity of the gigantic jumbotron looming over Sacramento’s Golden 1 Arena. The double-sided main screen is supplemented by two columns of screens affixed to its side. You see advertisements non-stop; there is no way to not see an advertisement. …

My neighbor Glen once laid on the floor of my apartment and refused to leave on account of his extreme drunkenness. After a couple hours of pleading with him to leave, I reluctantly yelled and kicked him. His dog Lucky snarled at me, defending his supremely wasted master. “Listen Glen…

circa 2013. — On the literal edge of his seat. Pulsing, shaking. He is largely unresponsive during battle if not curt. His fingers pulsate and tremble with nervous energy over the backlit keys of the expensive laptop his father toiled for. Striking them in unison with ferocious mouse clicks creates a symphony of ventilated aggression. The air is positively thick with early summer humidity as his jaw clenches and chair creaks…

circa. 2013 — How the fuck did you get this number? Don’t EVER call again, asshole. I dunk the slimy plastic receiver down, fingers sticky from an unidentified gunk that wouldn’t submit to my frantic paper towel and hand soap cleansing earlier that day. At a more orderly work station to my left…

Yesterday, KSI vs. Logan Paul insanity swept over the internet like a delirious fever dream. Accordingly, I took advantage of the ONLINE INTENSITY by transforming Arena into a raucous watch party🎈 for the event. It took a couple posts on 4chan’s sports board to recruit fresh blood for the discussion…

I cast a wide net when recruiting for Arena. It’s not always pleasant, but it’s occasionally worthwhile to slum through the shittiest corners of 4chan, reddit and Discord in search of the most bizarre thinkers imaginable. But sometimes, they miraculously find me. One memorable instance of this strange serendipity involved…

Welcome to my online portfolio. Here you’ll find links to various blogs, articles, and other internet content I’ve written, produced and edited for websites like GeorgeTakei.com, Guacamoley, Dictionary.com, FanSided, and more. Way down at the bottom you’ll see a couple videos featured from my YouTube channel. …

Highway patrol won’t always pull you over for going 10 miles above the speed limit. Rules have flexibility; leniency happens. …