The Mad Tea Party
(Language)
Alice felt dreadfully puzzled. The Hatter’s remark seemed to have no sort of meaning in it, and yet it was certainly English. ‘I don’t quite understand you,’ she said, as politely as she could. ‘The Dormouse is asleep again,’ said the Hatter, and he poured a little hot tea upon its nose. The Dormouse shook its head impatiently, and said, without opening its eyes, ‘Of course, of course; just what
I was going to remark myself.’ — From Alice in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll
The Tea Party in Wonderland sounds familiar. It sounds remarkably like the frazzled public discussions I hear daily; willy-nilly shifts from one topic to the next, none concluded, and with no serious attention given to point or conclusion.
I suppose I’m being a fuddy-duddy. How boring it would be if conversation was limited to clearly stated ideas backed by reason and evidence? Much more fun to ramble pointlessly . . . and look, we’re almost out of time.
Move down, move down, make room for, next!
The Hatter explains to Alice that the Mad Tea Party never ends. It’s been frozen in time at 6 o’clock ever since the Hatter tried singing for the Queen of Hearts. The Queen, in a pique of outrage accused him of murdering the time. “Off with his head”, she cried.
Time somehow keeps the Mad Hatter from decapitation by making sure the tea party never ends. Alice is not impressed with such nonsense.
She grows weary of all this silly talk and moves away to another adventure.
Would that we could do so, too.
The Mad Tea Party of real life never ends. Silly talk is de rigueur. That’s not quite right — de rigueur is a matter of strict etiquette. Life’s Mad Tea Party is more a matter of human nature. Conversation typically flits from this-to-that, and then, to something else.
There are exceptions, of course, but exceptions prove the rule.
People are entertained by chatter. “That reminds me”. What about”. “That, too”, and so on. Nothing is delivered. The topics come and go. The ever-shifting focus ensures that no single thought is ever revealed in full.
The process is euphemistically called “expressing yourself”. The reality that very little is expressed matters less than the entertaining glitter of the expressions.
I suppose this accounts for the popularity of social media.
The Mad Tea party in Alice in Wonderland took place at a very long table filled with one tea service after the other. When the tea and crumpets were exhausted at one station the party moved on to the next, saying, “Move down, move down”!
The party never ends.
Move down, move down, next topic, please! What? You’ve nothing to say, then let’s have a riddle, or a joke, perhaps some pictures. “Will you have
a little more tea”?
Next, next, next! “No time to say, hello, goodbye, I’m late, I’m late, I’m late. That’s what the White Rabbit said - and that was in the 1800’s.
Lack of time seems to be part of the problem, but not really. Clear, precise speech uses less time than muddled speech. If everyone spoke plainly there would be more time for everything else.
At the original Mad Tea Party the Dormouse is largely insignificant. He rarely says anything, and if he does say something, the Mad Hatter and the March Hare quickly dismiss his comments. His opinions don’t matter. No wonder he sleeps through most of the party.
Why bother to speak if no one listens, anyway?
Is this the reason for the madness of our modern Tea Party; everyone talks, and no one listens? Talking is so much more fun than listening, and besides, who cares about making sense, that’s soooooooo boring.
Move down, move down, next topic, please!
