You could have failed your English test if you used these phrases in school.

We all know that social media is changing the way we behave, the way we consume information and even the way we shop.

Recently, I’ve also started to realize that social media is changing the way we read and write (doesn’t matter what language, you will see why later). New words have been added into the Oxford dictionary because of Social Media.

So does it mean that I can write, “Once upon a time, I took a selfie with our Prime Minister and posted it on Facebook.” in my Commonwealth Essay submission?

1. “Watching stories”

These little “stories” expires within 24 hours on Snapchat and now Instagram and even Facebook and WhatsApp. This has resulted in tons of people just taking pictures of nonsense and not quality-controlling them before posting them unlike Instagram photos.

So now, there is nothing wrong when someone says, “I am watching stories right now!”.

I think my English teacher would have chased me out of the class (again) if used that in class. Mathematics jialat nevermind, English also cannot make it!

2. “I just tweeted”

Writing a 140 characters long text to rant about your morning train ride or summarizing the 5 different meals you ate today on an online platform called Twitter.

When you do not have enough character space, you can post that “tweet” first and then continue your rant in the next 140 characters. At this point you think to yourself, “I might as well have written a blog post on blogspot…”.

Also, I don’t think I was ever this excited about a bird tweeting, plus they shit a lot.

3. “Unlike”

The new meaning to “unlike” means to remove or withdraw your “like” (or the act of appreciating content online). It is usually done by click on the heart or the “Like” button again after clicking it.

I just “unlike” the food post because I am unlikely going to eat that.

4. “DED”

It sounds just like “dead”.

When something is so funny and you think you can’t handle the funniness, you say, “DED”.

When you send the wrong email to the client and you are in deep shit, you say, “DED”.

You can use it when you are really in trouble, or just as a form of exclaimation, like “OMG” but “OMG” is so yesterday right~

I said it so much I don’t even feel like death is a serious thing now.

5. “Selca”/셀카

A combination of the words “self” and “camera”. Usually used by Koreans when they post their “selfies” on Instagram. By the way, the word “selfie” has already been added to the Oxford dictionary.

Okay, this one is a bonus, because its not really used in Singapore. I was mind blown when I figured this one out. I THOUGHT “SELCA” WAS A TYPE OF FILTER ON INSTAGRAM. We don’t even use “self-camera” in English!

I wonder if kids these days will actually write about their Social Media experience in their English compositions. Because I think I just did…

Alright, time to pass up my homework!