4 things To Do: BEFORE, DURING, and AFTER an Event
Aug 25, 2017 · 4 min read
Developing relationships takes purpose and concious effort, BUT it doesn’t have to be hard.
Here are 12 tips to develop impactful CONNECTIONS, maximize TIME, minimize FEAR, and maintain CONTROL

Before
- Arrive 15 min late. AT LEAST 15 minutes. This gives the opportunity to survey the room when you walk in the door, to sense the energy from the start. Would you rather be the lion or the antelope? This gives you control over who you talk to and how long versus getting cornered. The cliché, ‘be fashionably late’ has a utilitarian truth to it.
- Research the hosts, speakers and attendees. Like the Boy Scouts say ‘always be prepared’. Consider research to be like drawing a map, helping you navigate the room in the most efficient way. It helps chart how to use the most valuable resources, time and attention, as effectively as possible. Leverage the search function in socials (LinkedIn, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Meet Up etc). If the event is worth half it’s salt, they will have a hashtag, or list of people attending on the socials. Consider reaching out to a few people you would like to meet or catch up with via direct message. Even better… find two people you think should meet and offer to connect them at the event.
- Have a Purpose. If your purpose is to meet as many people as possible then stay home, it isn’t worth your or anyone else’s time. Make your purpose specific: why are you there? Who/how can you help the people you meet? What are you looking for? What does success look like? Imagine shaking hands being asked what do you do? How do you respond? If you don’t know you need to understand your personal brand. My purpose is always to establish a deep genuine connection with ONE person everywhere I go, yes just one. Quality>Quantity.
- Have business cards. Obvious you would think. In today’s world you ARE the PRODUCT. They are cheap, and cheaper when you make it clean and simple. Minimialism the way to go here.
During
- Ask Questions, Compliment: Giving genuine compliments is the easiest way to strike up a conversation ‘I love your shoes!” or ‘Great tie!’ Just be genuine about it, people smell inauthenticity a mile away. Ask questions, people love talking abou themselves.
- Repeat names back then listen: ‘Nice to meet you X’ It helps to stick a name to a face. Have you ever remembered someone based on what you said to them? Listening, letting other people talk while asking questions. Neural pathways (memories) are built and better sustained the more information linked to it. The more information you gather from them, the better the story you are able to craft in your head. We are wired to remember stories not facts. The better story you craft through insightful questions, the more likely you will remember them after and be able to recall specifics.
- Don’t drink: I hear you laughing, but the idea alcohol ‘loosens people up’ and is somehow a benefit is just a poor excuse to escape reality. It blunts the ability to make connetions and remember key details, such as their kids names. If that doesn’t convince you I promise your wallet, and your waist line will thank you. I PROMISE I have never been laughed out of a room when I tell other’s I don’t drink, it actually makes me more memorable. However, if you don’t believe me and are afraid of being a black sheep…order a club soda with lime or lemon, it looks like a gin and tonic. Another AWESOME benefit: if you have drink tickets YOU CAN GIVE THEM AWAY, who would talk to you if you offer them a FREE drink? Generosity is always memorable.
Generosity is always memorable.
- Take notes: If it is an event with a program or speaker, take notes. Your future self will thank you when you go to write those follow ups or meet someone again.
After
- Leave before it ends. It gives you the opportunity to have another touchpoint with those you met ‘Goodbye it was great meeting you.’ It prompts a curiosity of where you may be going and demonstrates you are in control.
- Write on the back of each business card: Write down where you met them, the date and something that jogs your memory. Your future self will thank you gain. I still go back through cards to be able to reference the exact date/event when reengaging with someone I haven’t spoken with recently. It shows I care, have a memory like and elephant and may even guilt trip them a bit if they don’t remember!
- Follow up. Follow up in appropriate format, sometimes it is a phone call, others an email, or maybe just adding them to your LinkedIn. It depends on what your connection is and how it best moved forward, but an important touchpoint nonetheless.
- Add to LinkedIn. At the very least add them to your network so you may keep digital contact with them. This is the easiest way to ‘save’ your network, so when you go to look for a freelancer or accountant, you don’t need to rely on old synapse to recall someone, you just type in the search bar and the magic of technology gives you leads. They also get to know you, passively, with every post, share and like, they learn more about you and vice versa.
