Some of my learnings of 2015 (personal, academic and professional):

1. Ask and it will be given to you.

I never used to ask for things and I always believed that if I work hard, it will happen. IT WON’T. Often, you have to ask for things, whether it’s a pay rise, a project you want to work on or simply someone doing you a favour such as connecting you with someone else. It doesn’t mean you will always get what you want, but if you don’t ask then you definitely won’t.

2. It’s not me, it’s you

I used to take things personally. Sometimes, I still do but much less so than in the past. But I’ve learnt that people snap at you or aren’t helpful not because they don’t like you or you’ve done something wrong, they have stuff going on in their lives too and may be taking it out on you. I’m not saying it’s right but I found myself doing that as well. Over the summer, I was really stressed when I was travelling as I was interviewing for an internship, then applying for a visa when I had very limited Internet access and I realised that it took toll on my relationships with other people. Hopefully, in the coming year I can learn how to not take things out on others.

3. There is never the right time

I am the sort of person that can’t stop working until I have all of the stationery I ‘need’ (and by that, I mean coloured pens, several types of paper etc.). I seriously increased my step count simply walking back home from the library (and then back) because I ‘couldn’t’ start working before I had everything I thought I needed. I used to give up on healthy eating or dieting just because I ate a tiny chocolate bar (so I may as well now have a pizza, three other chocolate bars, and maybe some ice cream). Then I realised that I will never achieve anything if I am waiting for the perfect time. I forced myself to stay in the library even though I didn’t have all of the pens I thought I needed. After eating a chocolate bar, I would go for a walk instead of eating more junk food. It’s uncomfortable, I still sometimes fail but I got much better at starting to do things right now and not waiting until the circumstances are perfect. Today, I started writing this post; blogging is something I’ve been wanting to do for a while but I was always waiting for the perfect time (I still don’t feel it is now — but I am doing it nonetheless).

4. Don’t apologise from the outset

I used to apologise for who (and how) I am a lot. I still have to stop myself from writing an introduction to this post that includes something along the lines of ‘I realise that this may be cheesy’. I used to put down my achievements and tell people “I’m not sure how good this is…”. STOP. Most of the time, others don’t realise the tiny things you worry about when you hand in your work. Asking for feedback is very important but telling someone from the outset that you think what you’ve done is not good enough won’t do you any favours.

5. What is right for others, may not be right for you

Throughout almost all 4 years of my time at university, I had a clear direction that I wanted to follow. I worked hard. I interned almost every summer, I did practically every single extra course offered at my uni and almost everyone who looks at my CV says “Wow, you’ve done a lot of stuff”. And suddenly, a few months before graduation I changed my mind. I decided that I wanted to go into technology (with very little tech background or experience) and not into management consulting/international development (and these two have a lot more in common than you would think). So did my best friend. It was hard not to be jealous when she landed herself a spot on a graduate scheme considering that she was holidaying every year whilst I was doing internships. I knew that working in the corporate world wasn’t a path I wanted to take but it was still difficult not to feel bitter. After I saw her recently I finally got it: she is really happy in her job but I wouldn’t be. Sometimes, we all define ‘success’ differently.