There are algorithms out there which can write research papers some of which have also been accepted. There are also ways to extract topics from documents by analyzing the semantics of the content. Now what if I gave you a bunch of stuff from the Onion? You would probably be able to figure out that it was fake and then again you might not. (Once I shared a link from the Onion believing it was real) So, what then should a machine do if it is asked to summarize or extract a topic from such a document? Does it come under the purview of intelligence to detect satire and humor? Anyway, me and my cousin are working on a speller (software that can correct spelling errors). So below is some gibberish which I conjured and has absolutely nothing to do with what we are doing. At a glance you can say that it is nonsense. But how should and how would a machine interpret it?

Since the beginning of time (or rather when early man started writing) correcting spelling errors has been one of the most insurmountable problems that mankind has faced. So perplexing is this problem that it has occupied the minds of many for centuries- philosophers, linguists, mathematicians and billboard sign writers. Over the centuries, there have been many who have come tantalizingly close to solving this problem and ended up solving more simpler problems like the theory of relativity or the DNA model. We believe that Leibniz had an entire page of misspellings before him which somehow blossomed in his head into an idea that became known as calculus.

Our research has also shown that most if not all of the puzzling problems and events have underpinnings in spell corrections. The Pyramids at Giza for example were built by aliens, our study shows. A minor application of our algorithm on the misspelled Egyptian hieroglyphs at the Valley of the Kings makes it crystal clear. In a master stroke our algorithm solves both science and proves mythology by answering both the extinction of the dinosaurs and the existence of wizards. A powerful spell was accidentally misspelled by a wizard causing the end of the mesozoic era. From the time paradox problem to procrastination, it answers all. We claim that string theory is nothing but an extension of our algorithm with the different dimensions being the permutations of the words. Finally, our algorithm deals a coup de grace to all other approaches to all other problems by answering the question- “the answer to life,the universe and everything”.

We propose a novel approach to spell correction based on a quasi random distribution of hip hop culture in a Hilbert space. A socio-anthropic metric is used to normalize the misspelled word. The entropy of the resulting distribution is then mapped to a fractal representation of a possum’s brain. If you still think this is worth reading then do so. This approach was a result of much fine tuning which resulted after we came across the unique way in which Master Yoda conversed. Thanks to him, we were able to refine our algorithm to deal with ngram corrections.Further information on our speller will be made available soon, once we start getting results from the Large Hadron Collider.