Get Out Of Your Own Way

We are our biggest burdens.

On reddit, someone who had deactivated their facebook feed and instead subscribed to a daily quote shared today’s, which was Tolle:

In the same sense that we withhold from the world, we also withhold from ourselves.

We are often our own greatest hurdle.

Sometimes we don’t know where we’re headed, or what we want, or why we’re not getting it.

We think the answer is in “introspection” — inside ourselves — and the answer will somehow manifest if we just think about it more, retreat more, have more time, do more research, more analysis, a little more planning. Maybe, we think, the next book will have the answers, the next article, the next Instagram post. But they don’t.

The greatest answer is always in the same place as the greatest hurdle: in us.

We hope for a lot of things we never seem to achieve, and we keep looking for some “secret” answer that will fix this.

But, as Jill Bautista wrote,

“Life isn’t meant to be figured out. It is meant to be lived.”

The answers are not in diving deeper into the rabbit holes we’re convinced hold the solution.

To be entirely frank: the answers are only found by pulling our heads out of own asses.

And getting out of our own way.

We live, and along the way we get to somehow figure some things bit by bit.

And as we just stop taking “this thing” — whatever it is; ourselves, our intelligence, our superiority or inferiority or both, our fear of the opposite sex or desire for them, the promotion or proposal or sales pitch, whatever it is that we’re preoccupied with, or wherever it is that we hide — so seriously, we’ll fare better.

If you think the reason you struggle to relate to others is because “everyone’s an idiot,” then no — it’s because you’re misanthropic. I know genius-level individuals who have learned to coexist without misanthropy.

If you think the reason you struggle to find a partner is because “there’s nobody left,” then no — it’s because you have unrealistic viewpoints of yourself or your “idealized” partner or both.

If you think the reason you can’t accomplish is something is because you don’t have the right “plan,” or “enough time,” or any other resource, then no — plenty of people have done more with less, and the answer isn’t getting more time / money / etc. — it’s in you, relinquishing this viewpoint.

In all cases, it’s consistent: Get out of your head. The answer is not inside of you.

Shake it off, let it go, and get out of your own way.

If you’re not getting what you want, it’s because you don’t have your head right. Loosen up, stop protecting and defending that part of your ego (you know what it is) that you think makes you better — or stop stomping on that part of yourself that you think makes you “worse.” It’s these behaviors — not the behaviors of others, directly — that hold us back most.

You make the decision to hinder or help yourself.