How Do You Know If They’re The One?

Kris Gage
Kris Gage
Feb 28, 2019 · 9 min read
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Image for post
Jon Tyson via unsplash

Our desire for certainty makes total sense

RELATIONSHIPS DON’T HINGE ON FINDING “THE ONE”

IT’S NOT ABOUT “FINDING” — IT’S ABOUT *MAKING*

IT’S NOT ABOUT YOUR PARTNER, IT’S ABOUT YOUR EFFORT

“BUT WHAT ABOUT ‘FALLING’ IN LOVE?”

“BUT! CHEMISTRY!”

“WHAT ABOUT FEELINGS, THOUGH?”

“WHAT ABOUT MY PARTNER’S ACTIONS?”

“SHOULD I STAY WITH MY PARTNER EVEN THOUGH IT’S NOT GREAT?”

GREAT NEWS! YOU CAN STILL HAVE “THE ONE”

“THE ONE” IS NOT ABOUT PERFECTION; IT’S ABOUT DECISION

2. Having “The One” is mostly on you

GET YOUR HEAD STRAIGHT

HAPPINESS IS INTERNAL, NOT EXTERNAL

RELINQUISH YOUR NEED FOR CONCRETE, BLACK AND WHITE SIGNS

RELINQUISH YOUR “CHECKLIST”

“BUT I STILL REALLY WANT SOMEONE [HOT/WEALTHY/WHATEVER]”

“NO, I MEAN I WANT EVERYTHING”

More than “you just know” — you don’t even wonder

“But what if I DO still wonder or I’m still NOT sure?”


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