Any Wife Worth Anything Would Have Done Exactly What Hillary Has Done With Bill’s Other Women
How feminists let down Bill’s accusers, and why Hillary gets a pass…because if you don’t defend your spouse with everything you’ve got, what kind of wife are you?
My daughter is a much better feminist than I am.
She’s 20 and identifies herself as a member of the 4th Wave of Feminism — I myself didn’t even know there was one wave, let alone four — but I do consider myself a feminist, and tho I campaigned and voted for Obama in 2008, and voted for Bernie in the primaries, I have no problem supporting Hillary now. My daughter was a huge Bernie Sanders supporter, and after Hillary came out the victor, she has had a hard time switching allegiance. She can get behind most of the policy issues, but it was Hillary’s actions regarding Bill’s infidelities that is the sticking point; that she chose to support her husband by at best badmouthing these women in public –and at worst abetting alleged sexual assault by trying to discredit and malign his accuser(s) is what has brought about a crisis of conscious in my daughter.
“Her point was that these women should have been heard and listened to and not maligned right out of the gate…and I had to admit she was right.”
I understand her point of view, not only because she doesn’t want to compromise a key belief that rape culture must be called out at all costs, no matter the perpetrator, but because she has been a victim herself of sexual violence and encountered the reality of people turning a blind eye because it was easier to do so. I have spent time trying to explain what the 90s were like for the Clintons, especially Hillary — that there actually WAS a right wing conspiracy against them. That people like Gennifer Flowers and Paula Jones changed their stories the more money the Republicans deposited in their account. Even Juanita Broaddrick, who has accused Bill Clinton of rape, has not always seemed the most credible; but her point was that these women should have been heard and listened to and not maligned right out of the gate. That they should have been afforded that courtesy instead of immediately shaming them and calling them “bimbos.” And I had to admit she was right.
“We convinced ourselves (quite easily) that it was okay to abandon our feminist principles in order to further them. Much like what the GOP are faced with regarding Trump this election.”
Those of us on the left were more than willing to immediately launch on the attack, willing to promote the Clinton camp’s side of things, because it was convenient. Because we wanted him to win. We didn’t mind sacrificing these women on the hypocritical and public altar if it meant liberal supreme court justices (we’d just gone thru Clarence Thomas/Anita Hill), turning a blind eye was okay if it furthered our liberal political agenda — we feminists convinced ourselves (quite easily) that it was okay to abandon our feminist principles in order to further them. Much like what the GOP are faced with regarding Trump this election. It was for sure shameful, and these women deserved better from us all- with one exception. And that is Hillary Clinton. Because I don’t care what kind of feminist you are, which wave you came in or how Amazonian righteous power posse your feminist credentials are — if a woman fucks your husband, you owe her nothing. Not even if she claims he raped her.
“…let’s be honest, most of us have crossed the line with a guy already spoken for at some point in our life — but that doesn’t matter when it pertains to me and mine. You pull that shit with me and mine, I’m gonna make you pay for it.”
I’ve been married a long time now, just celebrated 25 years in August, mostly good years, but as in all marriages, some rocky ones in there too, tho so far as I know, my husband hasn’t cheated on me. But if he had I sure as hell wouldn’t show the other woman any respect or support. I would do what most red-blooded American would do: rail about what a slut she was to anyone who would listen. And hey, I am TOTALLY sex positive, fuck as many people, be as gender fluid as you want — just stay away from my husband. Because if you come near him with that kind of shit, and I find out, I will take all the hurt and anger and pain and direct it at you. And I will get all my friends to do the same — because that’s what women do. Even if we have been the “other woman” — and let’s be honest, most of us have crossed a line with a guy already spoken for at some point in our life — but that doesn’t matter when it pertains to me and mine. You pull that shit with me and mine, I’m gonna make you pay for it. I’m going to start on social media, I’m going to post everywhere and often, maybe I’ll pull a Lorraine Bracco from GOODFELLAS on your ass, and come to your building and start banging on all the buzzers and yelling for ten minutes straight that THERE IS A WHORE LIVING IN YOUR BUILDING. Okay, I think I’ve made my point here — it’s not the wife’s fault. It is never the wife’s fault for you choosing to sleep with her husband, and if you can’t take the fucking fallout, then don’t cross that line in the first place. (I’m looking at you Monica.)
“These women deserved better from us all- with one exception…Hillary Clinton. Because I don’t care what kind of feminist you are, which wave you came in or how Amazonian righteous power posse your feminist credentials are — if a woman fucks your husband, you owe her nothing.”
As for Juanita Broaddrick and the charge of rape — if it was my husband I would have done the same thing, immediately and swiftly tried to discredit her in any way possible. Because if you are married to someone, and have a kid, and built a life, and a woman accuses your husband of rape, and your first instinct isn’t to fight with everything you’ve got to defend your husband, no matter what, then what kind of wife are you? If it is so easy to believe your husband is a rapist then why the hell are you married to him? I may sound a little Lady Macbeth here, but your husband deserves a wife who would never believe such a thing possible from him and will fight with whatever she’s got to discredit it. Now, should he be subject to a thorough police investigation and if the evidence is there then charged with a crime? You bet your ass. If found guilty should be prosecuted thoroughly? Of course. And should this woman accusing him be believed from the outset? Yes. But not by his wife. Not by Hillary.
“I may sound a little Lady Macbeth here, but your husband deserves a wife who would never believe such a thing possible from him and who will fight with whatever she’s got to discredit it.”
So while my daughter is correct, that these women were failed by a misogynist society that embraces rape culture — that she had every right to hope for the first viable female presidential candidate to have a better record at fighting the patriarchy on this point as opposed to enabling it — the fact of the matter is that Hillary is a woman first. A woman whom we are constantly being told is “unrelatable” — well, on this matter she is totally and completely relatable. Many people have been cheated on, and what they hear in Trump’s attacks, by him and his merry band of adulterous trolls, when they try and hold Hillary accountable for Bill’s women, is the tacit underlying note of what these old men are really saying: that if Hillary was more fuckable he wouldn’t have strayed in the first place. And because of that these attacks will backfire. Hillary may have had to accept — and at times maybe even enabled — these women’s sordid intrusion into her marriage, but she is under no obligation to be an apologist for them as well.