another writer had already explained it perfectly
Stop Policing How Women Speak
Amy Nguyen
2549

see also Jessie Char’s talk “Expert of Nothing” https://vimeo.com/124384526#t=15m4s

“If bubbly voices are not what competency sounds like, then I shall continue speaking this way until this is what competency sounds like (also, I have no choice). And if pink dresses are not what competency looks like, then I will continue to wear pink dresses until people take them more seriously.”