Love Across Miles: Navigating International Relationship Challenges
Relationships are challenging, whether you live together, separately in the same city, or miles apart across the world.
When Daniel and I began dating, we were fortunate enough to live close together, which helped during the initial courtship period.
However, we’ve also had to sustain a long-distance and often international relationship when we travel for work.
Have you and your partner been forced to continue a long-distance or international relationship?
It’s tough, and it can be a real test of your commitment.
But with the right strategies, you can survive and thrive when you’re shores apart.
What Is an International Relationship?
An international relationship is when you and your partner are in different countries, which also means different time zones, separate continents, and many miles between you.
When you’re in an international relationship, it can be complicated to sustain contact and connection because of the distance and practical considerations.
5 Challenges and Solutions that International Relationships Face
If your partner is in another time zone, it can be difficult and very challenging to build a quality relationship.
Here are some common challenges you may face:
#1. Less Time Together
Obviously, the biggest challenge is not being together.
You see less of each other, and because of the distance, you feel disconnected.
Sure, you may call or write, but it can really feel like you’re ships passing at night.
Solution: Keep to a contact schedule. Skype, FaceTime, or Zoom at fixed times, send frequent text messages, and create fun things to do together. Daniel and I watched Netflix together while he was in Germany and I was traveling in Italy.
#2. Lack of Intimacy
When your relationship has reached the physical level, it’s heartbreaking to be parted.
You want to kiss, hold hands, and have sexual intimacy — but you can’t because you’re not together.
Solution: Create meaningful contact sessions such as both of you going for a spa and sharing a call or zoom while you enjoy the physical pampering with some connection. You can also explore digital sex if you’re feeling adventurous.
#3. Outside Temptations
When you can’t be with the one you love, it can be tempting to love the one you’re with.
Outside temptations like other singles can be a real challenge.
Solution: Discuss any temptation with your partner openly and honestly. If you feel really tempted, it’s time to make a plan to visit your partner or meet them halfway for some quality time.
#4. Non-Traditional Relationships
People have expectations when you are in a long-term relationship or married.
If you can’t be together, it can be highly annoying when your friends and family don’t understand and ask questions like when you are going to start a family or buy a house.
This can lead to conflict with your partner.
Solution: Clearly set boundaries with outsiders to your relationship. You set the rules. Discuss your relationship expectations with your partner and not your (or their) family.
Read more about international relationships:
#5. Sustainability
Any relationship needs contact, connection, exchange of energy, and support. If that’s missing in the long term, it will challenge the sustainability of your remote relationship.
Solution: Long-distance and international relationships aren’t feasible in the long run, so have an end-date in mind. Discuss when you will live together or how often you will see each other in person.
Final Challenging Thoughts
Only by being open and transparent with your partner will you manage the international and long-distance relationship.
Whether you are from the same country or if your partner is from a different country — at some point you should live together and build the relationship.
