Travel Blog: Peeking Outside the Box thru the Seed of Travel

Karmen Santiago
Aug 8, 2017 · 7 min read
My son bathing with the elephants in Thailand

Lucky enough was I, at the age of 12 to receive my first glimpse outside the “box” (box is usually a term of seclusion that society or one’s self creates for a person or group of people). The box is a symbol for me that represents my hood, my projects, my barrio and the quality of life that comes with those labels. My family valued consistent work ethic, realism, and had little means of providing more than food on the table. When, I was at the young age of 8 my whole life changed. My mother just disappeared! She just walked out the door one day and never came back. Representation of the the typical poor black fatherless stereotype was a reality in my life as well, some times he was around but most times he was not. Consequently, by the time I had turned twelve, I was an angry runaway that was full of misplaced rage and fighting every single day. My lack of respect for authority and terrible attitude was notably not my saving grace. What saved me from having a completely different life than my current one was, that I had what white people called “ smarts for a black girl.” School was always easy for me, I was in GIFTED programs, skipped a few grades, smart kid classes and not to mention I was a track star. So, when I stopped showing up, people noticed.
A particular teacher took interest in me when she found I had been living on the street and dropped out of school. Looking back, I know that she seen something in me that I was incapable of seeing at that time.

My son trying new things with our Chinese Host Family

This teacher somehow found my mother and within a couple of months I was on my first airplane ride out of my dusty poverty stricken box to the other side of the world. Okinawa, Japan. In my mind I was going to reunite with my mother, convince her to send for my sisters and brother and we would live happily ever after in a whole new world. However, reality from fantasy was quickly distinguished once I arrived. Upon my arrival, I was sat down and told by my mother that nobody knew she had kids, including me and she wanted to keep things that way. Hearing these words was a defining moment for me because I had been so angry with the world for so long for “taking my mother” from me, I had become explosive with bad behavior in her absence. Nevertheless, I had a new choice to make as truth and reality set in. I could either continue on my destructive path, or leave my hurt and anger with her and move on. I remember holding back my tears because I now knew she did not deserve to witness the hurt and suffering her absence had caused me. That would have been a privileged for her and one I would no longer bestow. The Pit of my stomach began to sink with sorrow and relief all at the same time. For the first time in what felt like forever, I chose life! With grand determination I made a decision right there that this would not break me and that I would move on. I gasped for air like as if it being the first breath I had taken since the age of 8. “The truth shall set you free” and In that moment, I was freeing myself of her burden and pain that she bestowed upon me. Pain and anger that I had let fester and spread like a virus thru me up until now. This was a new beginning for me. A solace that I could only find by traveling around the world to Okinawa, Japan at that time. For that reason. Okinawa will always hold a special Place in my heart. It was the beginning of my rebirth in life and on a new path.

Kenden in India receiving Hindu Blessings

I spent 3 years in Japan on this island millions of miles from where I began, it was life changing. I made life long friends with people of all cultures and I tried to absorb as much culture as I could in between bad habits of skipping school and hanging out with friends. Needless to say, it took 3 years to be kicked out of my mothers house in Japan, off the island and back to the projects I came from. Anxious about this new chapter in my life, I returned back to Arizona, a young 15 years old, 2 months pregnant, homeless yet hopeful. What I learned from that time in my life is that my mother may not have been able to give me the mother or support system I needed but she did unknowingly give me a single gift. A gift that will last a lifetime and one that I have passed down to my children. My mother gave this poor black girl a peep outside the box and that was all I needed to fully step out into my own light. Leaving the island of Okinawa, I knew I had plenty of obstacles before me but I was also now well equipped with a powerful knowing. Moreover, this knowing would stay with me thru the test of life and time and continuously push me to reject the norm, do more than the expected, continuously step outside my box and comfort zone.

That was 22 years ago and 4 kids earlier. I can write a whole book about what happen next but for now, I went on to have 3 children, all before turning 19. I Graduated high school by age 16 and started college. I joined the military at age 18, had my 4th child by age 24, finishing my college education in my early 30s and started law school all while raising 4 kids and surviving 3 failed marriages. Life has not been a fairy-tale for me, nor has it been an endless string of tragedy. Having traveled the world plays an enormous part of my ability to conquer difficult tasks, enjoy the moments I have with loved ones’ and reach for what is next to come. I never know how long I will choose to be in one place or where my spirit will take me next, so this allows me to continuously stay present in each moment. Complacency is just not a word in my vocabulary or understanding because I am always stretching to reach new heights and see new things. Traveling to Japan at such a young age allowed me to not only read or hear about the world, but receive a firsthand knowledge of it’s true existence. Traveling at a young age created a fire for life, for the people that live it and that fire has yet to burn out. As a girl from humble beginnings, seeing some of the world at a young age meant everything to me. While living in Okinawa, Japan I did not do anything extraordinary or even notice the changes that were taking place in my mind, body, and spirit. A seed had been planted that would be watered thru life experience and grow into its own force. Knowing firsthand that the world awaits one’s every step, has transcended my mission to pass the same gift, the same seed given to me, to my children. The gift of what traveling to a place outside ones comfort box brings. This gift becomes more than just seeing a different country. It becomes a knowing in one’s spirit. A life long journey.

Celebrating Thailand New Year In Thailand

I am currently in India traveling with my youngest son who happens to be the same age I was when it all began for me, 12. I am still reaching outside every box I find and hoping to inspire him to do the same one day. He does not know it now, but a time will come in life when he will need the strength and fearlessness that comes with stepping outside the box and the knowing that there is more life to live. The ability to interact and experience culture that is different from one’s norm can only come thru travel and experience. I only hope to succeed in giving him that same knowing that lives within myself that was planted first thru Travel.

To those who may come across my blog, I want you to know that your most beautiful self is your free self. Step outside the box you are in and share in all the warm welcomes and beautiful smiles that await you. Travel The World!

By Karmen Santi

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