I was wondered to found one odd fact: I don’t wanna speak about some persons in Russian. Because they’re special.
For the same reason I don’t like to talk about them and show to nobody. There is the simplest explanation which lies in my self-doubt generating loss aversion. It should be the case that in this people I see what I want to gain but still didn’t. Seems that probability of this is about 90%. Nevertheless, it’s very hard to find this “what” which I have not but, for example, Mr.X has. On the contrary, I realize that he magnetizes me due to our similarity and not for I wanna get, but what I already have on my own. But it’s probably an illusion which could be destroyed just by more deep analyse. And I don’t wanna dig it for a while.
p.s. So much “I” in this text, it’s a good sign.