The idea for “Colorless” was on my mind for a few months. The title was inspired by Murakami’s novel Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage. For “Colorless”, I wanted to capture my feelings following a destructive time in my life. I picked up unhealthy habits, struggled with loneliness despite being surrounded with people, questioned my life trajectory and had no idea where I fit in. At one point, I had enough and took strides to straighten out my life. I reached out to a ton of old friends and acquaintances, asking to hangout. I nomaded to 10 different cities reconnecting with friends and meeting new ones along the way. Somewhere in this process I found myself falling back to music production, something I haven’t touched in five years. It gave my life direction again.
My favorite line in the song is “Long nights in LA bring up the thought of you but it dims away slowly”. LA has a special place in my heart. Every time I’m here, I feel calm and at peace among the creatives in the city. Taking long walks at night under the street lamps is my way of being mindful, acknowledging my feelings and letting go of the negative ones. The “you” can represent a lot of things. It can represent a failed romance, an unhealthy addition, a lack of self love, isolation or all the above. The last part of the line “dims away slowly” creates a visual blend between my internal thoughts and the visual imagery of the dimly lit streets of LA. It evokes a feeling of letting go and moving forward.
Negative experiences will always be a part of me and I acknowledge that but it no longer dictates who I am and my life going forward.
Thanks for taking the time to read this post. I hope this helps and relates to those who‘ve gone or are going through similar struggles.
Song fun fact: I wrote outro piano melody when I was 12. It goes to show that you should never throw projects away.
Special Thanks
I want to express gratitude to the individuals that made this song possible.
- Kasi, thank you so much for singing on this track! You are one of the nicest people I’ve met along this musical journey of mine. I hope we can work together again in the future. You slayed.
- Ron, thank you for your feedback and mastering work. I’m happy to have worked on this song with a fellow Bay Area artist. #dyingbreed
- Josh, you are an absolute beast of an audio engineer. I am grateful for all your work.
- Jon, your designs are absolute fire. I hope one day I can return the favor with a free Coachella ticket haha.
- To my friends and family who have been with me since the start, I genuine love each and every one of you. Even if we no longer live close to each other, I know we’ll be friends for a long time.
