Things I Should Have Known Were Red Flags

  • When he made me keep my eyes open during the scary parts of The Shining
  • That smell coming from my roommates bed
  • Too many Woody Allen movies on DVD
  • The second time he left me on read
  • His skateboard
  • When he gave me a self help book for my birthday
  • That her favorite show was GIRLS
  • “We don’t really have a budget for this project, but you’ll be paid in exposure!”
  • Her rude dog
  • That she ended up puking every time we went out
  • His Gemini tattoo
  • “You’re not like other girls”
  • All his recommended videos on YouTube
  • That I never met his mom
  • The Fight Club poster
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