Embracing Your Weirdness Through Play — Living by Your Rules

Play means having fun and fully living into you

Kylie van Gelder
3 min readJan 25, 2022
Photo by Pim Chu on Unsplash

We all have it in us. Some are good at hiding it. Some pretend it’s not there, but we all have it. Weirdness!

For many years, I hid my weirdness. My husband knew about some of it, but most of it I kept a secret. Now, slowly but surely it’s coming out. Man it’s freeing!

Your weirdoness is what makes you unique.

At least this is what I’m learning.

At the same time, I’m also learning who can handle me at this level and who can’t. Something that’s scary as hell, but also totally refreshing.

Rather than trying to impress people, as I used to do when I was a full on perfectionist, I’m just doing my thing.

Sure, there are times when I fuck up. I mean I’m not perfect (Get it? Ha.. or maybe it’s just for the perfectionists out there). But overall, checking in with my weird side is fun. I feel more like me.

My kids sometimes look at me like I’m a loonie toon, but I’m hoping it will teach them to stay connected to their loonie toon side too.

How can you connect to your weirdness?

One major way to connect to your weirdness is part of what’s called play.

For those of you who are still new to the arena of playing for pure enjoyment without caring what others are thinking, it’s an essential part of living.

Dr. Stuart Brown, a clinical researcher, founder of the National Institute for Play and author of Play: How It Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination, and Invigorates the Soul, says:

Play is the stick that stirs the drink. It is the basis of all art, games, books, sports, movies, fashion, fun, and wonder — in short, the basis of what we think of as civilization. Play is the vital essence of life. It is what makes life lively.

He also goes on to say we need play like we need sleep and nutrition.

There are all sorts of ways you can enhance your life and play more. One of them is living fully and deeply into your weirdness.

Your weirdness is where you connect and find your playful space.

If you’re curious about some of my old and more recently discovered weirdnesses, I’ll list a few. Many of these don’t get done outside the house though. I’m still a work in progress.

Here it goes, and in no particular order, these are my go-to weird gigs

  1. Air guitar Seriously, this is flipping fantastic! I fully get into it too. There are certain songs I can’t even stop myself from playing the pretend instrument. I’ve even caught myself doing this while out for a jog. Who knew? I sure as hell didn’t.
  2. Dancing without thinking OMG super duper act of total freedom! This is a regular occurrence in my house now. We all just let go a move our to the beat, or totally off beat most of the time. No rules. No thinking. Just moving to music and having fun.
  3. Reading to my kids using different voices per character. I’m not sure this one needs any explanation. I have a variety of voices and they think it’s hilarious. Boom, good enough for me!
  4. Doing puppet shows. I remember the first time my mom saw me do this. We were in Prague. There was a marionette puppet store. I picked one up, put on a show and she just about fell over in laughter and surprise. Again, my kids love the shows I put on. We even have a puppet show in our living room.

In the end, I’ll admit, doing many of these things is totally scary when you share them with others. What matters though is how they make you feel. If the answer is your weirdness makes you feel free, like you’re playing and having fun, then awesome. Do your weirdness! Being weird means being yourself and isn’t that what life’s all about?

Maybe if we all shared our weirdness with the world, we wouldn’t be seen as weird. We’d just be seen as ourselves, without judgement. It’s cool to think about.

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Kylie van Gelder

Life Coach | MSc Psychology | Podcast Host | Work in progress writing about self-improvement, motherhood & life. www.kylievangelder.com