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November 8 — Blind

There’s been a few times I’ve had moments that so dramatically altered my perception of well, everything.

The easiest was when I first wore glasses. That was neat. No more squinting to see street signs, or not understanding why theaters were so great since the screen was blurry.

The others were more complex. I was 16 or 17 and watching V for Vendetta with my sister, within the film there is a side bar story about a lesbian couple told by one of the women, who on coming out is disowned by her parents, and yet goes on to have happiness until the shitty dystopian world that erupts around her turns on her. Her partner goes missing, and then she’s tortured and eventually murdered for doing nothing more then being in a beautiful consenting relationship with another women.

To put this in context I grew up in a somewhat conservative household, the kind where disapproving comments were made anytime a non-straight moment showed up on tv, and the fact a friend of the neighbor’s mom was very gay(you know the stereotype, he embraced it) drew comments in less then complimentary tones.

That story line, in the movie made me very uncomfortable. Back then I was already convinced that equal rites was a good idea. That if no one is being harmed, that we really don’t have any business getting into other people’s business.

But I’d also inherited the hetro-only mindset of parents generation.

It was while analyzing my response to that part of the movie that I realized I had some really shitty, feelings towards queerness as a whole. And I decided that needed to change. I felt like a hypocrite. I believed in equal rights, and yet there was this low-key loathing for an entire group based that had never done anything wrong. Who wanted nothing more then to express their identity on there terms and love who they loved.

So I started correcting myself. I changed my bias.

And you know what, it’s awesome. Watching TV shows with the idea of “what if everyone was bi?” going in the back of your mind instead of assuming everyone’s straight, that’s fun.

Watching all the adorable couples come out and be awesome is fun.

Not feeling hate, disgust, and all those other negative things for people who do not deserve it. That’s also fantastic.

It’s also driven home just how much representation matters. How much not pretending the world’s okay matters.

Conversion camps are still a thing. Parents in Ontario freaked out when the idea that not only are people gay, or bi, not everyone feels the same way about their gender, was made part of the sex-ed classes in schools.

On the other hand Queer Eye is back on netflicks(and it’s amazing. Go watch it honey.)

In closing, don’t be afraid to question where biases come from. It could open your eyes, and leave you in a better world.