Where did you grow up?
I moved to Connecticut when I was two and spent 95% of my childhood there. I went to a small, 150 person, catholic school and that was my entire world. I liked the people I was with, but didn’t want to spend all my time with them, so I commuted 20 miles west to go to an all boys Jesuit high school; it was the best thing I ever did.
I generally felt out of place, disincentivized to do the things I loved.
I really differentiated myself early on, but no one ever pushed me in High School. I did a lot of stuff on my own because I felt like I didn’t get any support in the things I loved growing up. I generally felt out of place, disincentivized to do the things I loved. There are a lot of areas where I can’t possibly be the best at something, but I want to find that niche where I can be. I was an only child growing up, and I think that changed a lot of things for me; Einstein once said, “The monotony and solitude of a quiet life stimulates the creative mind.” Growing up, I was always making things because I was so bored. That creativity continued escalating, and now I’m here.
I have no idea why I’m alive; I’ve been trying to find my purpose for a while. I still feel different, but the internet was really instrumental in helping me find like-minded people.
Will being the best make you happy?
I think happiness comes as a result of fully developing your abilities and maximizing your potential. I created a law [for myself] that in order to be happy I need to fully evolve my creative abilities. I’m trying to figure out if I’ll ever get to a point where I’m happy with my position; I may believe there is some better position I can get to.
Is part of the reason that you’re doing these interviews is to find that place you fit in?
Yeah, that, and finding my position in relation to these 37 other really smart people. Are they having the same struggles? Are they doing better than me? Are they going to be more successful than me? I think I’m a good position. I haven’t talked to everyone yet but everyone is struggling with these questions of having ideas, creating them and finding happiness. I haven’t figured out the happiness thing yet, but I don’t think any of us have.
I don’t think of success and failure any more. I only think of value and a lack of value. Failing right now means I go back to school and get a degree. That’s not exactly failure, it’s more like not fully developing my abilities.
I don’t think of success and failure any more. I only think of value and a lack of value.
I don’t think you can be content. I think it’s a curse. If I become content or satisfied, I’ll stop being able to make really cool things. The reason I can create is because I’m not okay with my current position. It’s a really difficult struggle; I can’t be okay to be okay.
In the last year alone my perspective of the world shifted. This year I’ve felt like I’ve had two big perspective shifts. As I go forth I’m hoping more and more of those perspective shifts happen. I feel a little a directionless; I’ve thought a lot about leaving school, and I’m still not certain about what the best opportunity for me is. Not knowing is, understandably, terrifying. A lot of my friends are leaving school, and I wonder should I leave too.
I think I can make myself happy by building things that make other people happy.
I think I can make myself happy by building things that make other people happy. That’s why I’m building tools that help us understand other people’s lives…because that’s valuable to me.
Thanks to Ani for the photos.
