You Don’t Need To Have An Opinion On Everything
Sometimes it’s just better to listen and keep your mouth shut
Please make this end…
My silent plea for some divine intervention came after spending 30 minutes listening to my colleague explain to me why I was burned out. Never mind that I had said the reason behind WHY I was feeling so tired earlier in the conversation (when I’d been allowed to get a word in). The man talking to me felt compelled to explain his own theories as to why I “thought” I felt so exhausted.
“You’re actually overthinking things!”
“Buddhism says that the expert…”
“Well in my experience…”
I had the urge to shout, “I don’t want to hear about why you think I’m burned out! I made a statement regarding MY experience!”
But I resisted.
I used to be guilty of giving out unsolicited advice when I was younger. While sitting around a table discussing a topic I didn’t want to feel left out. As a result, I found myself jumping in, just to feel like I was a part of the conversation.
I shudder to think how my own friends at the time must have been suppressing the same thoughts that I was having now with my coworker.
Listening is an undervalued quality. Influencers tell you what they think. Your friends discuss important issues (or at least important to them) with passion. Twitter has no problem casting judgments in a millisecond.
An opinion is ok to have, but it should be an informed one. In this case, my coworker was more interested in talking, pursuing the role of “the wise office guy”. He didn’t know me. His questions were geared to get answers to support his hypothesis. Ultimately though, the lack of knowledge of who I was and what I’d been through made everything he said annoying, not helpful.
I didn’t need anyone to have an opinion on my personal decisions. Nor should other’s butt in when not asked. Unless it is something that is causing harm to others (or themselves) what can you say that the person doesn’t already know?
Take a second next time before offering an opinion that wasn’t asked for.
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