PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT

This one is for you, smokers.

Why do you smoke? Is it the rush you get when in you fill your lungs, or is it because you’re addicted or do you just genuinely not give a fuck? I am one who is all for everyone having the ability to make their own life choices but are you aware of the consequences of smoking or are you just blatantly ignorant? I mean you must notice the graphic pictures pasted all over the cartons and you must be aware of the negative connotation to it. Now I can’t speak for any of the consequences of smoking, except for one and even then I can’t speak specifically; just generally. I’m talking about Cancer.

I’m not looking for any attention or anything else out of this other than purely expressing what I see when I look at smokers, and perhaps make people understand how much of a twat they look like.

As an 18 year old I was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukaemia (ALL) out of no fault to my own or anyone else for that matter. I didn’t get a choice about getting cancer. I didn’t smoke 40 a day and know that it would eventually come to give me cancer. It just came.

Now everyone knows about the journey of what a cancer patient goes through (Chemo, Radiation Therapy, Surgery). But things that aren’t fully understood are the other side affects. Let me paint a picture of what you are possibly leading yourself to.

You get to sit in a hospital room no bigger than some bathrooms for weeks and weeks on end with nothing to do other than stare at 4 bland walls and think. Now if you are lucky like me and enjoy the company of yourself then you’re in luck! Maybe you won’t hate every waking moment.

I bet that smoke is worth it though hey?

Next thing you get too see is the inevitable discomfort that your friends and family try their best to hide when they come to see you. Now if you’re lucky again the most you’ll ever get is discomfort and won’t get the pity and shame.

Now the really fun stuff starts to pop up when your prognosis starts to look a bit bleak. Your friends and family shut themselves off emotionally to deal with the possible looming inevitability of you dying. As much as they put on a brave facade it is blatantly obvious. Now if you’re lucky like me and you survive the bleak prognosis and come out the other side this is where shit gets really fun.

I have a a question for you. What do you normally do when you get a sore throat or a cough? Probably head for the Panadol or cough-syrup and try to up the intake of water. Smart.

What do I normally do when I get a sore throat or cough? Well it depends really. If it starts with a sore throat, ill start by checking whether my thyroid is swollen. Not swollen? Looks like I don’t have thyroid cancer just yet. Then I will proceed to check the lymph-nodes around my neck and body to make sure they aren’t swollen; hopefully the cancer isn’t back. I’ll stress for a week and then go get bloods done just to make sure that the fun life that I get to live isn’t getting ripped out from underneath me again. Along come more and more looming cancer risks that you check like a checklist.

Fuck me that sounds super fun ay, pass me another dart bruv.

I bet you have fun going out or going to the pub? Get to see heaps of your mates and just have a fun time. I get to look forward to the looks of discomfort as people spot me and try to avoid me because they would rather not burden themselves with talking to the bloke with cancer. Awkward conversations where people hit me with small talk while obviously trying to bring up the big cancer conversation, like that is the only aspect of me worth talking about.

Now this is all just the mental side affects. I am lucky in the sense that I have practically no negative physical side affects following treatment. Once you get diagnosed with that inevitable disease that comes with smoking I’m sure its going to be a lot better for you carrying around that oxygen bottle for the next piss up at the local.

This is all just in the perspective of a young adult. What if you have kids? Fuck me that would be really painful watching your kids cry when your partner has to explain to them that daddy or mummy wont make it because they thought they were cool smoking when they were younger. Or when your partner has to support the family because you can’t work anymore as you’re undergoing treatment for one of the various diseases you could get.

If you’ve got this far and thought man this life sounds fucking sick, sign me up!

  1. You are an absolute idiot
  2. Continue smoking and let natural selection weed you out.

But if any of this seems like something you really don’t want to deal with, then sort yourself out, get help and stop smoking. In the end you don’t look cool with a durry hanging out your mouth when out on the piss or having a smoko at work. You look like a fucking twat. And I can tell you, from my perspective, you look like an ungrateful one at that.