Xenophobia, Entertainment and Bullies.

How “The Bachelor” Exposed the Inauthenticity of the Fairy Tale Ending.

Juan Pablo Galavis. You may have heard of him or seen his face plastered on celebrity magazines. He was this season’s “The Bachelor” — you probably read (horrible things)about him in a tweet, gossip blog or Facebook feed. Or you may have watched the show.

Who is this guy? You ask yourself. Well, that “jerk” is my friend. My “cuate” (bro). I know the type of human being, father, friend, son and man he is. He is kind, thoughtful, considerate and loyal. My boyfriend calls him “one of the nicest” guys he knows.

As any brother and sister, we have our disagreements. He is human — a tendency to be stubborn and as some of you witnessed on tv, brutally honest. But on the flip side, his stubbornness becomes resilience in face of adversity and his honesty the path to transparency and openness during conflict.

He is also one of the most caring people I know.

Unfortunately for America, they did not see the real Juan Pablo on television. Like his friend Zak said, what you are seeing is an edited down version, a “character” for entertainment purposes (fueled by xenophobia). But this is not the “real” Juan Pablo. I know this.

So @JuanPaGalavis I hope America sees that you have been edited down to a “character” used to tell a story. But not a story of the real you.

— Zak Waddell (@RealZakWaddell)

For those that are not familiar with the term, xenophobia is the intense or irrational dislike or fear of people from other countries. As a sociologist, I will evaluate on this later on.

Juan Pablo believes in honesty while speaking a second language: English. Professionally, I work with languages and technology — how they interact and involve themselves in our lives. I know for a fact that, when talking matters of the heart, the instinct is to always speak in the mother tongue — so basically, intentions don’t translate well when discussing emotions. Then you add editing and inconsiderate hunger for ratings — you get this.

Things get lost in translation. For example, “I like you a lot” can be roughly traduced to te quiero but can also mean you care and love a person as well.

The equivalent of “I love you” is te amo — but this is said rarely and only when there is that deep connection of being in love. Unlike Americans, Latin Americans don’t say te amo in every relationship. We just don’t. That is why he didn’t say it. He needs to share that intimacy with just her. But the fairy tales tells us Prince Charming should yell this at the top of his lungs. He should demonstrate it to everyone on his truth.

Having known Juan Pablo for years, I have never heard him share stories of exes, girlfriends, lovers. He has always been private in these matters.

The horrible neglect of the production company to provide language and emotional support to him (and his family) and educate viewers on his cultural background resulted in this “character” that America loves to hate.

I believe NZK, the production company, is to blame. I know this as a fact. Linda Holmes from NPR write, “[they] decided that they needed a different framing for the season — one in which their bachelor was kind of … a jerk. They made a choice to cut him loose. To throw him, in reality show terms, under the bus.”

While I do agree to a certain extent that Juan Pablo wasn’t cut out for the show, this was only exacerbated by NZK neglect to provide support and guidance….. and for throwing him under the bus.

And during “After the Rose”, the bus repeatedly ran over Juan Pablo and his final choice, Nikki.

Holmes wrote: “You were watching the struggle between a network production trying to put together a neat narrative about a guy women could have fun gabbing about as a Bad Boyfriend and a guy who was not at all prepared to have that happen, regardless of whether he deserved it.”

That hate was found in the horrible tweets and Facebook comments. The horrifying bullying of social media. They were not only targeted at Juan Pablo, but also his girlfriend (see tweet below) his daughter, his family.

Being in the public eye does NOT give you the right to say what you want to me. Your words hurt no matter what. Be ashamed of yourselves.

— Nikki Ferrell (@Nikki_Ferrell)

THIS IS NOT OKAY.

NO. It “esss” not “okay” to make fun of someone’s accent, nationality and cultural background. It is not classy, people. And well, just insensitive. But above all, that is xenophobic. Shame on you, America.

And the host, Chris Harrison — what a cowardly decision to go to media outlets and choose such an inconsiderate approach for your public attacks on Juan Pablo. How horrible are you to push him to say something all for your ratings and your fake happy ending. Shame on you.

NZK. shame on your cultural insensitivity in every decision you made (casting, editing, marketing) that has created this “character” of a person.

Thankfully, I know the real Juan Pablo. Te quiero cuate. It’s okay.

Best,

::LG

This post is focused on how a large media corporation has abused the trust of a whole family with their xenophobic and cultural insensitive approaches. On a personal level, this is not about Juan Pablo’s choice of words to describe gays on prime time. Having grown up in San Francisco Bay Area and raised by an open-minded mother, I am a fierce proponent (as is Juan Pablo and the Galavis family) of marriage equality and gay rights.