The Practice of Getting Uncomfortable

Laura Gale
Aug 31, 2018 · 5 min read

What scares you but also sparks feelings of excitement? What do you want that you’re afraid to go after, but could change your life forever?

A lot of my growth comes from leaning into the spaces in my life where there is curiosity but also fear. The practice of being uncomfortable and facing fears has hugely expanded possibility in my life.

I have spent the better part of a year stepping outside of what is comfortable more than I ever have to create a life I am so excited about. But doing this has brought up a lot of emotions. It was almost like I was creating this wild storm inside of me, and it came and went in waves. There were moments of calm followed by electricity, excitement and fear. A lot of sh*t came up… sadness, vulnerability, doubt, but also a lot of expansion, courage, love… gahhh so many feelings!!! It was also this beautiful storm that gave me the energy and momentum to pursue some scary goals. I trust and know now that this is the place (super uncomfortable place) where transformation happens.

At the time I decided I was leaving my job last December, I wouldn’t say my vision was crystal clear, nor did I have a well laid out plan — eek. What I did have was a very strong sense of how I wanted to feel and what I wanted and did not want in my life.

What I also discovered was something that I felt deeply connected to and excited to explore. This connection sparked when I started doing my coaching certification. To be coached and to coach others was a more powerful relationship that I had imagined, build on trust, openness and authenticity.

So, I invested in completing my coaching designation and for fun I also threw in the experience of learning to sail in the frigid rainy November cold. Within a couple of months, I resigned from my job, ended a relationship and booked an 8-week solo sailing, trekking and surf trip in Scotland and Norway. For me, this trip signified a transition point between the life I was living and the life I wanted to create for myself.

Through this process of transition and change, these are the 5 most important things I have reflected on that helped create a journey and life I was excited about again.

1. DISCOVER

Solo exploring got me out of a funk a few years ago when I felt disconnected, uncomfortable being alone with myself and very low energy. Since I was not comfortable with solitude, that’s where I started. I started doing and exploring things on my own. I just went for it — flying lessons, scuba diving, travel, poetry, cheesemaking, photography, sailing, journaling, earthquake preparedness, road biking, half-marathons, triathlons, surfing, crocheting, hiking…. Not all at once, but once I started I began to get more excited about life, learning and experiences. To explore and discover new interests, I had some amazing experiences and really got to know myself. So, when in doubt, get out! Discover new places, create new experiences. It can be so simple, last night I took off my shoes at a quiet beach and walked, feeling the rocks, the sand and kelp on my feet and my toes.

2. LISTEN

The most important lesson I have learned is to listen. Listen to my feelings, what feels good and what doesn’t feel good. I’m not ignoring these feelings, nor am I analyzing them, just trusting my gut. Getting quiet and just listening and being curious about what’s coming up for me has helped me connect to my emotions on a deeper level. What I love now is that my job is listening powerfully and supporting clients in deepening their connection to their authentic selves. When you listen powerfully to yourself it’s impossible to continue to ignore your purpose, your values and your direction.

3. LET GO

I love visualization. It is a tool that has been very powerful for me. Several months back, I did a guided meditation and visualization. In the visualization, the gift I received was a sword. I knew immediately what it was for, I needed to cut the strings that connected me to what was no longer serving me in my life… I knew the two areas I needed to let go of was my relationship and my career.

Letting go of my relationship was not easy, at all. There was a lot of heartache and tears. I still feel moments of sadness and loss. The practice of letting go of someone I loved is a hard one but what I can appreciate is that every person brings something into my life and what it connected me to is what it feels like to love a really good and magical kind of love and how I want to feel in a relationship. Ugh I tear up even writing that…it’s a process ;)

Letting go of my career was a bit easier as I had created some wonderful and lasting friendships. I was stepping away from a career where I dedicated my education and 10 years of specialized HR focus. So, I didn’t take the decision lightly, but I knew my connection to what I wanted in my life was stronger than holding onto a career that didn’t align with my values.

By letting go, I created the space in my life for new and unknown possibilities. Letting go is still a practice and a process, so I still have to be compassionate with myself and patient.

4. TRUST

I’ve grown to be at peace living with the often-uncomfortable feelings of self-doubt of not having it all figured out. I have practiced trusting that it will work out and that my dreams will come to reality. I full-heartedly believe it, or I tell myself until I believe it and then I put it out into the universe. It has been a practice, but I know that accomplishing my dreams and pursuing my passion is possible. The practice of trusting has also allowed me to enjoy the journey to a much greater extent.

5. CONNECT

I have learned to connect more often to my values and to the people in my life that believe, love and support me.

Values are so powerful. When you live your life aligned with your values, you are living a fulfilled life.

My top 5!

*Connection * Integrity *Adventure *Authenticity *Compassion

Once I got really clear on what these were, these values act as a compass and guidepost for the decisions I make in my life. I realized that the times I have felt the most unhappy or disconnected is when I am compromising one or more of my important values. Once I had these values clearly laid out in front of me I knew my only option to pivot from where I currently was and move forward.

Finally, I shared my thoughts, feelings and dreams with my people. These are the people that have my back no matter what, I trust them, they don’t judge my dreams and ultimately, they believe in me. Surround yourself with these kinds of people.

SO…

If you are reading this, my challenge to you is to raise a storm in your life… go after the uncomfortable and create storm so beautiful and electric that it evokes feelings of excitement, fear and vulnerability. This is the place where transformation and expansion occurs.

Laura Gale

Written by

Coach & People Consultant. Lover of adventure, new experiences & meaningful connections

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