Like most people, you probably have a handful of ‘idols’ that you look up to. People who you admire and aspire to be like. You read their writing, you watch their interviews, you listen to their podcasts, you follow them on social media; you don’t want to miss out on what they have to say and following their work is a way to learn from their journey.

In a way it’s great to follow what your idols are up to. You can learn about how they got to where they are today, and you can emulate their journey — heck, maybe you can even get in touch with them and ask them for advice! …

This is the first time I’ve considered New Year’s resolutions. Usually, I do my best to uphold Benjamin Franklin’s advice:

“Never leave that till tomorrow which you can do today.” — Benjamin Franklin

If I don’t like something, I prefer to change it ‘now’. I never liked waiting until the New Year to start making progress. But I feel differently this year.

You see, I’m a planner. I like to set myself milestones, both short-term and long-term goals; ‘things I want to achieve this year’, or ‘within the next five years’, or ‘things I want to do in my lifetime’. And although I always appreciated that the future is unpredictable and that my plans may change, I never foresaw any imminent, radical changes to my environment that would prevent me from carrying out my plan. …

The year is finally rounding off. Many people have had a tough time; most at least a discomforting one. Your plans may have been canceled or postponed, and you may not have achieved everything that you hoped you would. In turn, the thought of starting a new year that comes with a whole new set of challenges, milestones, and goals, might seem daunting.

If you’re anything like me, the unexpected events of 2020 might have knocked your confidence slightly, and maybe you don’t quite feel like your best self. Yes, we’re turning over a new leaf, but you might not feel particularly optimistic that things will improve. …

Has this ever happened to you? — The night before an exam when you start to panic because you think you don’t know anything, or the morning before you have to give a presentation and you forget all the words?

The reason why this happens is that when you’re stressed; your body releases a hormone called cortisol, which interferes with the process of forming and recalling memories.

The memories are in there, but you’ve shut the door to that part of your brain. You’re stressed and tense, and it’s not letting you think clearly.

Now, I’ve worked in B2B sales, strategy consulting, and law, so I’ve watched and given my fair share of presentations. In fact, there were weeks during my role in consulting where my days consisted of just that — giving presentations to industry experts. And I can guarantee this — not every expert is good at presenting and not every presenter needs to be an expert. …

I recently listened to Oprah’s Super Soul Conversations Podcast; an episode titled Best Lifesaving Lessons, in which she talks to Gavin De Becker, a security specialist and author of The Gift of Fear.

He talks about the fear which, as a woman, you have inevitably felt countless times. The tension that runs through your body when you’re walking home alone at night, or when you’re the only woman left in the train wagon you’re in and you still have a while to go.

I mentioned this to my close friend and he rolled his eyes like I was exaggerating. …

There are times where you go on a date and just don’t find ‘that spark’. You both had every good intention, you were eager to find your potential match — but nothing. You’re happy to be friends, but you don’t want to be in a romantic relationship with them. Oftentimes you don’t even know why. Until you call it quits. That’s when the real reason comes to light.

I’ll use an example.

I was living in Madrid when I went on this particular date. He was a really cute guy, who had come highly recommended by my best friend. He was smart, funny, generous, thoughtful; on a shallow note — handsome too. He ticked all the boxes.

We arranged to meet for a drink at mid-day in one of Madrid’s many plazas. I was ten minutes late, but that’s practically early — remember, we’re in Spain. He had managed to time my arrival perfectly and greeted me with a freshly served vermouth that was still cold. What a babe.

We spoke for a couple of hours, and he was great; I really liked him — as a friend. I didn’t know why, I just didn’t feel a spark. We went on a few more dates which only confirmed my initial impression, so I was honest. …

The start of a relationship is always exciting. You’re getting to know someone new from scratch. There’s so much to learn about them that every day is exciting. You feel butterflies in your stomach every time you receive a notification, when you’re on your way to meet them, and when they reach out to grab your hand. You’re in the honeymoon phase. But sadly, that’s exactly what it is — a phase.

At least that’s what it’s like for a lot of people. The passion in a relationship often has a bell-shaped curve. The curve goes up as you get to like them more and more; then it peaks, and then it curves back down again. The goal is to stay at the peak. …

There are days where I manage to check everything off my to-do list. And there are days where I don’t even come close. You’ve probably experienced that feeling. It gets to about 4:00 pm and you realize there’s no way you have the energy left to complete everything you have to do today. You’ve had a slow day.

The truth is that you might be setting yourself up to ‘fail’ from the very start of the day without even realizing it.

A series of small, counter-productive habits at the start of your day can have a big impact on your mindset. Instead of giving you the energy you need for a productive day, they’re eating away at your motivation. …