Conservatives vs. Liberals, A Conversation

Or, why we can’t all just get along.

L: Here is a thing that is bad.

C: It is bad, but that is supposed to motivate you to make your life better.

L: But it is still categorically bad.

C: But I avoided that bad thing by making good decisions.

L: But why should people who make different decisions than you be punished?

C: To motivate them to be more like me.

L: But a) lots of people are not like you, b) lots of people can’t be like you (because of age, race, religion, health, ability, name it), and c) lots of people don’t want to be like you (because of a) lots of people are very different than you).

C: Those people are bad.

L: But you might accidentally be one of those people one day, because of forces outside your control.

C: That’s in the hands of God.

L: But you could avoid the worst consequences of the bad thing, even if you are subjected to the bad thing through no power of your own, if we worked to fix the bad thing.

C: But if we fixed the bad thing, how would people be motivated to be more like me?

L: They aren’t now. The only people who are motivated to be more like you are already like you. Besides, why is it so important that everyone be like you?

C: Because I am good, and a good society needs people in it who are good like me.

L: But I thought a good society was a society where people were free to be different from each other.

C: They are free to be whatever they want, but that doesn’t mean they don’t deserve the bad thing if they choose to be different than me.

L: I don’t think anyone deserves the bad thing, including you.

C: Well, that’s because you’re a bleeding heart liberal.

L: I guess so.